Page 75 of Corkscrew You
“I’ll tell them you respectfully decline,” says the waitperson, and glides off again.
“Tut, tut, should have taken our order first,” says Chiara, and raises her hand to attract a different waitperson. “Another water, Shel?”
“Thanks,” I say. “This time, make it a double.”
I’m home by ten, and I’m never going to sleep in this mood. There’s that saying: don’t let the sun go down on your anger. Well, the sun’s gone down, but the night’s not over yet. I do what I absolutely know I shouldnotdo. I call Nathan.
“You OK?” is how he answers.
Ishouldsee this as a sign that he worries about me – that he cares. But right now, all I can hear is that’s he’s being patronizing. He doesn’t trust that I can cope with the hard truths.
I launch into it. “You’re meeting with Ted tomorrow. And, no, Chiara didn’t blab. I heard it from the horse’s mouth.”
He blows out a breath. “Fuck, you live in a small town.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I demand. “What else are you hiding from me?”
“I’m not hiding stuff from you,” he says, with heat. “I’m doing my job!Yourjob’s making wine, and I’m making sure you can focus on that!”
“By keeping me in the dark?”
“Why burden you with responsibilities you don’t need to own?” He’s properly pissed now. “Winemaking needs a clear head and a positive attitude. Don’t get on my case for making it easy for you to do your job well!”
“It’smywinery!” I yell at him, sending cats scurrying.
“It isnot!” he retorts. “It’s JP’s winery! When didthatparticular fact pass you by?”
I’mthisclose to hanging up when his tone softens.
“Shel, I’m sorry. You’re right. I should have kept you more informed. I just … didn’t want you to worry.”
“ShouldI worry?”
“I’m working on it,” he says.
“You’re doing it again!” I accuse. “Brushing me off! What do you think I’m going to do if I hear the truth? Collapse in a heap? I know the realities of this business! Don’t be a patronizing jerk!”
“Oh, youknowthem do you?” He’s pissed again. “So that means you knew the winery was in the shit and you just – what? Ignored it? Crossed your fingers and hoped it’d go away? Good strategy.”
He’s not wrong. And I hate him for it.
“Likeyou’reso perfect,” I say, the spiteful child in me taking over. “You can’t even manage a relationship.”
Oh, fig, that’s not what I meant. But before I can unplug my foot from my mouth, he starts to speak.
“You know what?” His voice is tight with anger. “You’re right. I can’t. So how about I don’t try? How about we just go about our jobs with the minimum amount of contact, and when my contract’s up, I’ll be out of your hair forever. Sound good? Thought so. See you, Shelby.”
And he’s gone.
Guess I won’t be going to dinner on Wednesday.
Shit. I can say that word; the situation warrants it. Shit, shit, shit, I blew it. It’s all my fault.
Everythingis my fault. If I’d been more onto it right from the start, I’d havemadeDad write a will. I don’t believe he didn’t want to; he just never got around to it. We had a lot in common, Dad and I.
If I hadn’t crashed out after his death, I wouldn’t have had to rush so much to find investors. I let so much slide during that time, I know I did. Nate’s had double the workload he should have, because of me, and my lack of organization.
No wonder he didn’t tell me anything. Why bother, when I’ve proved myself incompetent? I mean, even this morning, I was handing him Cam’s bill far too late. Everything should be budgeted and accounted for by now. I knew that. But I didn’t make it happen.
