Page 28 of A Very Grumpy Navy SEAL

TEN

Koa

Lula tenses at my words.I don’t blame her.I’m not thrilled about having to ruin our time together by talking about my departure.I wish I didn’t have to, but I can’t ignore the pit in my stomach.Not when every moment we spend together is a countdown ticking louder in my head.

“My room or yours?”she asks.

“Mine.”

She nods, waiting as I unlock the door.I follow her into the room, and the door clicks shut behind me.

I only have two more days in Wolf Valley, and then I’m gone.Back to base.Back to the structure, the orders, and the predictability of Navy life.

I clear my throat, leaning against the doorframe.“I don’t want to mess this up.”

Lula sits on the bed and tucks her legs beneath her.“Mess what up?”

“You.Me.Us.”

“Koa—”

“I just… I want to know what you want.Out of this.With us.”

Her eyes search mine, and I can see the gears turning in her mind.

“I want… this.You,” she says after a moment.“But I also want to stay here.I like it in Wolf Valley.I like the quiet, the space, the way people smile at you in the grocery store like they mean it.It feels like home.”

I nod slowly, trying not to flinch.“I figured.”

“What about you?”she asks.“How much time do you have left in the military?”

I let out a breath.“Two more years on my current contract.After that, I can re-up or let it run out.”

“And you’d be stationed where?”

“Still at the same base, most likely.Virginia Beach.Unless they transfer me.”

She nods.Her fingers fidget on her lap.

“It’s not just that,” I say.“I’ve been planning to make a career out of the SEALs.I always thought I’d do twenty years.Retire with a pension.Maybe move into private security or train recruits.It’s all mapped out.”

“Sounds smart,” she says quietly.

“It is.It was,” I admit.“Before I met you.”

She looks down, a crease forming on her brow.I reach across the space between us and touch her hand.She doesn’t pull away, but she doesn’t squeeze back.

“I want you, Lula.More than I’ve ever wanted anything.But I’ve made commitments.To my team, to the job.I can’t just walk away.”

“I’m not asking you to,” she says, pulling her hand back gently.

“But you also told me you don’t want to live on a base,” I say.“You don’t want that life.”

“I don’t.”Her voice breaks slightly.“I can’t.I’ve lived it through Ledger.The deployments, the distance, the constant anxiety.I want roots.I want to build something that doesn’t disappear every six months.”

“If you stay here, we’ll be on opposite sides of the country.We won’t be in the same time zone.We’ll never see each other.”

Her head snaps up, and she glares at me.“And if I go with you, I’ll be in Virginia, all alone for half of the time.We still wouldn’t see each other!”

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