Page 71 of Johan.

I head back upstairs to the bathroom. The hot shower feels like a temporary escape, washing away the remnants of last night’s emotional turmoil. I try to clear my mind, but the thoughts of Johan and his fiancée, Astrid, keep creeping back in.

After getting ready, I unplug my phone from the charger on my nightstand. The screen lights up with two missed calls from Johan and a text message.

While I have to spend the week with Astrid, I'm free for the next one. Let's get together. X

The confirmation that Johan is spending the week with Astrid feels like a punch in the gut. My first impulse is to throw the phone against the wall, but I take a deep breath, trying to calm the storm of emotions inside me. Instead, I sit on the edge of my bed, staring at the message, feeling the weight of reality pressing down on me.

With a mix of frustration and resignation, I type out a response.Where? Here or in the UK?

I send the text and then place the phone down beside me, knowing that despite his good intentions, it might be almost impossible for him to come back. Doubts swirl in my mind, and the pain of the situation feels almost unbearable.

I sit there for a moment, the silence of the room pressing in around me. How did I get here? How did I let myself fall so deeply for someone I can’t fully have? The questions are relentless, but there are no easy answers.

I start getting dressed, pulling on my favorite sweater and jeans, when my phone buzzes again with a message from Johan:Wanna go to St. Moritz on the 8?

26

Johan

“Thankyou so much for postponing your boys’ trip to the Alps for me,” Astrid says over the phone. Her voice is bubbly, filled with excitement. “I’m so excited to spend the week with you.”

“Are you sure you’re okay, though?” I ask again, just in case she’s still too hungover to come. “You didn’t seem well last night.”

“Don’t worry,” she says almost instantly. “I spent all morning in bed, drinking water and taking medicine. I’m more than ready to see you tonight.”

I roll my eyes, playing along. “Great, happy to hear.”

“So, where are we spending the week?” Her question is a not-so-subtle way to remind me that she doesn’t want to spend the whole week at my parents’. Great, I have nothing planned.

I take a deep breath, forcing a smile into my voice. “Well, I was thinking after dinner, we could spend the evening here, and then after tomorrow, we could go to Paris by train.”

There’s a brief silence on the other end, and then she squeals with delight. “Oh my gosh, that sounds wonderful! I’ll get my bags ready. See you later!”

After she hangs up, I stare at the phone, feeling a mix of relief and determination. I have no intention of taking her to Paris. If everything goes according to plan, Astrid will be too sick to travel. Since yesterday evening, I've been researching what to give her so she’ll be bedridden with food poisoning all week. The idea of her being confined to bed, unable to do anything but rest, sets my plan into motion. By the eighth, she’ll be back home at her parents, and I’ll be in St. Moritz with Conrad, a few other mates, and Hannah. The first thing I have to do, though, is call Conrad, who still has no idea about the trip to St. Moritz itself.

I reach for my phone, my fingers trembling slightly as I dial Conrad’s number, hoping that he’ll agree to my plan.

The familiar ring echoes in my ear, and then his cheerful voice breaks through. “Hey, man!” His tone is bright, almost infectious. “What’s up?”

Taking a deep breath, I begin cautiously. “Doing good, thanks. How was the party last night?” Even I can hear the forced casualness in my own voice.

“It was great. Olivia had a blast. She’s still talking about it.” His words are laced with amusement, and I can almost see his grin.

“Glad to hear it. How’s she doing?” My attempt at small talk feels awkward but necessary.

“She’s good. She slept over but left a few minutes ago. She’s got a trip scheduled with her friends. You know how it is.” His voice carries a hint of weariness, the same one I feel.

“Yeah, I hear you.” I pause, swallowing hard. “Speaking of trips, I’ve got this idea. How about a week in St. Moritz as a farewell before I go to Oman? Just the boys, from the 8th to the 13th?”

Silence. I imagine Conrad’s brow furrowing, the gears turning in his head. “That sounds great, but Olivia invited me to spend the week with her parents in Paris.”

My heart sinks. I close my eyes, pinching the bridge of my nose as frustration bubbles up. “I really need this trip, Conrad,” I murmur, my voice dropping to a whisper. “I told Astrid’s dad that you were organizing a boys’ trip to St. Moritz. I need to get away from her.”

A heavy sigh drifts through the phone. “I’m tired of covering for your sorry ass, Johan. But since you’re leaving for Oman, I’ll make an effort.”

Relief floods through me, and a smile tugs at the corners of my mouth. “Thanks, man. I owe you one. Can you invite a few more mates? Make it seem like it’s a boys’ thing only.”

Another pause. I can almost hear the skepticism in his silence. “And I suppose Hannah is a boy too?”

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