Page 57 of Johan.

“Will do.”

With that, the conversation ends, leaving me standing alone in the room, surrounded by the echoes of our words and the enormity of the choices ahead.

I drop the phone on the bed, staring blankly at the wall. The room feels colder, and I wrap my arms around myself, trying to find some semblance of comfort. The silence is deafening, each passing second a reminder of the looming ball and the inevitable decision I will have to make.

Taking a deep breath, I head back downstairs to the living room. Everyone is still gathered around, enjoying the appetizers and champagne. I feel the weight of their eyes on me as I enter. “Sorry for the delay,” I say, trying to muster a smile as I sit beside Hannah.

She looks at me with concern, but I force a smile, trying to mask the turmoil inside. As the family continues to chat and laugh, the warmth and cheer of the room feel distant to me. The holidays, meant to be a time of joy and togetherness, have become a minefield of complications and heartbreak. But I’m determined to navigate it all for Hannah’s sake. For our sake.

Lunch has passed in a blur, the taste of the food overshadowed by the weight of my thoughts. After lunch, everyone migrates to the petit salon, including the three kids, who are very animated and eager to play with their toys. Their laughter and energy fill the room, creating a stark contrast to the heaviness I feel.

Hannah keeps up appearances, playing her part flawlessly, never showing any sign of weakness. Her smile is unwavering, her laughter genuine, or at least convincing enough to fool everyone else. I, on the other hand, feel out of place, the festive atmosphere clashing with my inner turmoil. Once my drink is empty, I head to the bar for a refill, seeking a brief escape from the familiar ritual.

Amelia approaches, her presence a comforting familiarity. “The kids are really enjoying their new toys, aren't they?” she says with a smile, glancing at the children.

“Yeah, they’re having a blast,” I respond, trying to match her lighthearted tone. “Lunch was great too. The roast was cooked perfectly.”

Amelia nods. “Absolutely. And that dessert? I think I could have eaten the whole thing by myself.”

I chuckle, though my heart isn’t in it. “Yeah, it was delicious.”

But then her expression shifts, concern creeping into her tone. “What's up, Johan? You seem like you saw a ghost.”

I take a deep breath, the weight of my confession pressing on me. “It's the NYE’s ball at the Goschens,” I admit, the words heavy on my tongue.

Amelia's eyes widen with a flash of understanding. “I get it. You don't want to leave Hannah behind, do you?”

I heave a sigh, exhaustion etched into my features. “I don’t even want to go myself.”

Amelia gently takes the glass from my hand and pours some Macallan into it, her movements deliberate and calming. “I understand it's hard when your heart isn’t in it. But we all have our roles to play. If Astrid finds out you're here, she'll tell her dad, and he might reveal Hannah’s secret getting her expelled.”

“Maybe I can find a way to convince Dean Pembroke to keep Hannah,” I suggest, grasping at straws. “Or I can talk to Ludovic; he needs me for the expedition. He doesn't have time to find someone else.”

Amelia shakes her head slowly, her expression turning serious. “Creating mistrust and friction will only make him lose trust in you. We need him to see you as the perfect son he never had. Otherwise, he will never give you access to the inner circle. His contacts, the locations where the sales happen... Hannah will understand.”

I look at her, the weight of her words sinking in. The reality of our situation feels suffocating, but I know she's right. The stakes are too high, and our plan too precarious to risk any missteps. I nod slowly, the resolve building within me. “You're right. I just… wish it didn’t have to be this way.”

Amelia places a reassuring hand on my arm. “We all do, Johan. But for now, we have to stay the course. For Hannah, and for all of us.”

I take another deep breath, steeling myself for the challenges ahead. The room around me buzzes with life and laughter, but my mind is already planning the next move, determined to protect those I love, no matter the cost.

23

Hannah

After spendingthe afternoon in the petit salon catching up with my parents, they finally leave, taking with them the new toys and the children. Julia takes Arthur’s small hand in hers, ready to lead him to the foyer. He clutches his toy sword in one hand and a small dragon figurine in the other, his steps reluctant.

As they reach the doorway, Arthur glances back over his shoulder, his gaze landing on Johan standing beside me. His wide, hopeful eyes search Johan’s face, a flicker of longing in them.

"Is Johan coming home too?" he asks, his voice filled with innocent curiosity, holding his dragon a little tighter.

Julia bends down to his level, smoothing his hair with a gentle hand. “No sweetie,” she says softly, "Johan is staying at Oma’s."

Arthur's face falls slightly, his disappointment evident. He glances down at his dragon, his little knight momentarily crestfallen. But then, with a bright spark of an idea lighting up his eyes, he looks back up, his grip on the sword tightening withnewfound determination. "Maybe tomorrow you guys can come and spend the day with us," he suggests, his small voice filled with hope.

Johan glances at me, and I nod, a warm smile spreading across my face. “I’ve missed my bedroom quite a bit,” I admit softly, feeling a pang of homesickness.

Arthur beams at our agreement, his joy contagious. "Yay! It will be so much fun!" he exclaims, already imagining the adventures to come, waving his sword around as if vanquishing invisible foes.

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