Page 91 of Beautiful Scars: Unshakeable

"You're thinking about them, aren't you?" Garrett's voice turns sharp. "Your precious Zane and Levi. Do you think they're coming to save you?" He laughs, the sound echoing off the concrete walls. "They couldn't protect you before. They can't protect you now."

I try to hold onto memories of strength—of training with Chase, of Jade's fierce friendship, of feeling whole lying between Zane and Levi. But they slip through my fingers like smoke as Garrett's torture continues.

The painting's colors blur as tears finally escape despite my best efforts. Three days. Just three days and I'm already starting to crumble. The thought fills me with shame, but I can't stop the tears now that they've started.

"There you are," Garrett whispers, wiping away a tear with mock tenderness. "I knew you were in there."

I turn my head away, focusing on the mattress where the tracker lies hidden. If it's still working. If anyone can find it. If, if, if...

The blade bites deeper, and this time I can't hold back the scream. It echoes off the walls of this underground hell, and I hear Garrett's satisfied sigh.

"Now that’s music to my ears."

Thedoorclicksshutbehind Garrett, and I count his footsteps as they fade up the stairs. One. Two. Three... Fifteen. The heavy thud of the upper door. Then silence.

My legs shake as I push myself up from the leather couch, rope burns circle both of my wrists. Blood trickles down my body, from dozens of cuts. Painful, but only a few are deep enough to cause any permanent scars.

I head to the bathroom and start the shower. When I step in, the water turns red as it sluices down my body before it swirls down the drain.

I press my forehead against the cold tile, letting the water run over the fresh cuts I can feel crisscrossing my back. Each one stings enough to steal my breath, but this pain is almost welcome compared to what I know is coming. Almost.

"Go clean yourself up," he'd said, voice dripping false concern. "Wouldn't want you getting an infection."

Yeah, I'm sure that's what's going to end up doing me in.

My hands shake as I reach for the soap—the same brand I used at home. The familiar scent turns my stomach now. Everything here is a skewed mirror of my life—all my favorite things corrupted by him.

How long? How long can I survive this?

I've been able to count the days by the light in the window well that comes through. But, it's only a matter of time before I lose them. Before I stop paying attention. Stop caring.

If this is the way things are going to be, if nothing changes, I know I could last weeks. I've done it before. But months? Years?

Years.

The soap slips from my trembling fingers, clattering against the tile. My knees buckle and I slide down the shower wall, wrapping my arms around myself.

Years of his knife, his fists, his hands, and his games. Years of watching pieces of myself get destroyed and stolen and washed down the drain until there's nothing left.

How long will it take to make me forget what it felt like to be loved, to be safe? To make me forget who I was outside of here?

Part of me thinks it can't come soon enough.

The water runs pink around my feet. I stare at it, remembering other showers, other times I've lived this moment, or one similar, out. But this time is different. This time I think my luck has finally run out.

Maybe itwouldbe better, easier at least, if I start accepting that this is my life now. This is it. This is all I have.

At least until my body gives out. Until my mind splinters into too many pieces to ever get back.

I mean, realistically, how many cuts can I endure before I bleed out? How many times can a bone break before they stop healing? How many times will he force me to show him how much I love him before my soul dies completely?

Too many.

But he's too careful, too controlled. He won't let it happen quickly. This is his revenge—not just on me, but on everyone who tried to protect me from him. On Levi for daring to love me first. On Zane for making me feel safe. On Jade for being a friend.

The water starts running cold but I barely notice. My skin is numb, inside and out. I should get up. Should take the advice and clean these cuts before they get infected. Should try to stay strong.

But what's the point? Even if the tracker works, even if they find this place, how long until I end up back with him? I can see how pointless trying to run has been. This is my fate.

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