Page 49 of Beautiful Scars: Unshakeable

Sunny

Ican'tsleep.Thereare nights when my skin feels too tight and my scars ache and I can feel the monsters stirring—waiting for me to close my eyes and expose my throat to them. It happens less often now, but it's still there. Usually being tucked between Levi and Zane's warm bodies, and listening to their steady breathing for awhile is enough to calm me. Enough to soothe me into sleep. But tonight it just feels… claustrophobic.

I carefully extract myself from between them, holding my breath and freezing when Zane stirs. His protective instincts run deep, even in sleep. The years I spent growing up learning to be quiet and careful serve me well now. I slip out of bed without a sound, and stand at the foot, pausing to watch them. Zane's long dark hair spills across his pillow. Levi's face has lost its usual intensity in sleep. The sight of them together catches me off guard sometimes—in the best way.

The house creaks as I find my way downstairs. Light spills from the dining room, voices murmuring low. My first instinctis still to freeze and assess the threat. But I recognize Chase's laugh, followed by Ty's quieter response.

"That's not how probability works, man," Chase is saying as I reach the doorway.

They both look up, Chase's face breaking into his usual bright grin while Ty's eyes sharpen with concern.

"Angel!" Chase pushes back from the table. "Come join us."

Papers and laptops cover the table's surface, along with empty energy drink cans and half-eaten snacks. The familiar chaos helps ease the tension in my shoulders.

"Am I interrupting?" I ask, sliding into an empty chair.

"Never. Just getting some work done," Ty says, his gaze assessing me. "Everything okay?"

I wrap my arms around myself, avoiding his too-perceptive eyes. "I couldn't sleep."

"Nightmares?" Chase's usual playfulness dims. They all know how hard sleep is for me. They’ve all been woken up in the middle of the night to me screaming more than once. This house is huge, but it's still small enough that there aren't a lot of secrets between any of us.

"Yeah." I pick at a loose thread on my sleeve. "They're not as bad now, with..." I gesture vaguely upstairs. "But sometimes they still come."

"Want to talk about it?" Ty offers quietly.

I shake my head. "Not really. I just needed some space, maybe watch some TV or something."

"Well, you're welcome to stay out here and help us work through these shipping manifests," Chase says, pushing a stack of papers my way. "Though fair warning—it might bore you to death."

That startles a laugh out of me. "That bad?"

"Worse," Ty groans. "Chase's lack of math skills is giving me a headache."

"Hey! My numbers are perfect. You're the one who has to go over everything fifty times."

Their familiar bickering settles over me like a warm blanket. I’m amazed at how easily they've accepted me into their world. Into their family. How freely they offer comfort and protection without making me feel weak for needing it.

"You want some tea?" Ty asks, already standing. "I was about to make some anyway."

"That would be nice, thanks." I pull my feet up onto the chair, curling into myself. "You guys really don't mind me crashing your work session?"

"Angel, you're always welcome," Chase says with surprising seriousness. "Besides, you probably understand this stuff better than I do."

"Don't sell yourself short," I tell him. "I've seen you. You're smarter than you let on."

His grin turns sheepish. "Don't go spreading that around. I've got a reputation to maintain."

Ty returns with three steaming mugs, setting mine in front of me. The familiar scent of chamomile rises with the steam. He remembers how I take it—the opposite of my coffee, no sugar, just a splash of milk.

"Z and Levi still sleeping?" Chase asks, accepting his own mug.

"Yeah." I wrap my hands around the warm ceramic. "I didn't want to wake them. They worry about me enough as it is."

"They love you," Ty says simply. "We all do."

The words catch me off guard, making my throat tight. Even after all these months, genuine affection still hits me sideways sometimes.

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