Page 92 of The Brave and the Reckless

And after this, the sex-tape conversation didn’t feel as threatening anymore.

The bedroom door had just swung open when another arm wrapped around my shoulders.

“Hey, can I talk to you for a second?” Sanny boxed me into the kitchen, but it wasn’t lost on me that Noah stopped in his tracks and leaned against the wall right outside, even if his back was turned to us.

“What’s up?” I asked and pushed myself against the counter in a way that hopefully hid the way I squeezed my thighs together for dear life.

“I know that, uh, you and Noah got caught at his family’s place during the storm, right?” His words were slightly slurred, but his eyes were locked on me with complete focus.

“Yeah, we did,” I answered, not willing to give up more information than need be.

“I don’t know if he told you, but uhm, I’m working with him on it. We’re turning it into a therapy ranch.”

Oh, thank god, at least I didn’t have to facethatconversation just yet.

“Yeah, he’s told me something like that,” I said, trying to sound nonchalant.

“I hope you’re not mad at me.”

“Why would I be mad?”

“Because I’ll be leaving Bravetown, and I just got you this job here. So, like, I don’t want you to think I’m abandoning you or anything.”

“I thought the therapy ranch wouldn’t open for another two years?” My eyes skipped from Sanny to Noah. If I’d gotten that detail wrong, I’d have to go over the deadlines on the to do lists I’d created again.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, give or take.” Sanny nodded vigorously. “And so, I was thinking, maybe you’d want to come work with us. We can all switch over from Bravetown. But you have experience with chronic pain and injuries and such. Like, personal experience. And we don’t.”

“Why don’t we talk about this tomorrow when you’ve sobered up a little?” I tried to sound calm and collected, but that same panic that had been creeping in for two days was thrumming loud in my ears.

“You don’t have to worry about Noah. I already asked him. He’s cool with it.”

“You asked him?”

My eyes snapped back to the archway, where Noah had taken the Ace Ryder hat off and was now watching me, not even trying to hide his eavesdropping. He’d talked about me to Sinan, about my future. He’d talked to my brother before talking to me.

“Yeah, and there’s all kinds of jobs you can do if you don’t want to work with the horses. I think we have a list of jobs. I think Noah has a list. He has lists. You’d like them.”

“Uh-huh.” He sure had a list of jobs. The one I’d put together so he could start looking into the hiring andtraining processes for various positions he’d need to fill. Had he looked at that and considered which role to assign me, so he could keep me around?

“Yeah, and then you’ll be taken care of no matter what, you know? You’ll always have a job. And he said he’d be nicer to you. And you don’t have to go back to school like Mom wants you to.”

I’d be taken care of.The words cracked through my chest, leaving a deep chasm behind.

It was never going to be about what I wanted.

I’d never get to justlivewithout someone hovering over me.

For years, I’d accepted my parents’ specific brand of overprotectiveness because I’d been comfortable. I’d been on a clear path toward a future I wanted, which happened to fit their vision of a perfect little daughter. Hell, Mom had mentioned, more than once, that by going to med school, I’d probably meet a nice surgeon to marry one day, and we could be a doctor power couple or something. I’d ignored those comments for years. I’d ignored that they didn’t let me go to birthday parties. I’d ignored that they didn’t let me drink alcohol. I’d ignored every single tie they’d slung around me, not realizing how hard it had become to breathe.

And I’d fallen into the same trap again.

Taking a job at Bravetown had been a comfortable option. I’d wanted a fun summer, so I ignored that Sinan and Zuri had been needling me about my plans for the future. That he voiced his disapproval of the choices I made, to play Annie Lou or to film videos with Lucas and Noah. I’d even accepted that he didn’t want me to make amess ofhislife, so I’d putmylife second, sneaking around with Noah for weeks when I’d wanted to spend every second of every day with him because he was making me feel things I’d never experienced.

Only for Noah to do the same thing as the rest of them.

I’d be comfortable staying and taking a job at his ranch. I’d just have to ignore that he and my brother would be planning my life behind my back because they viewed me as someone who had to be taken care of.

The betrayal hit me in the stomach like a fist. Bile burned the back of my throat. I blinked through the sudden tears blurring my vision and pushed away from the counter, leaving Sanny in the kitchen without another word. I stormed past Noah, peripherally aware of how he said my name and touched my elbow. There was no way I could talk to him. No way I could even meet his eyes right now. My heart was too weak; I’d accept the offer to stay and work at the ranch, and I’d let him take care of me, just to be with him. So I kept my eyes straight ahead. I was done compromising on my independence.

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