Page 91 of Our Song

‘Ah,’ said Fiachra.‘Is it all Stockhausen and Schoenberg?’

‘Sometimes,’ said Jess.‘And Xenakis.’

‘I mixed some Xenakis in with Aphex Twin when I was DJing last year,’ said Fiachra.‘It worked pretty well!’

He asked about her work and she explained about the found objects and noise installations.

‘I’m not sure I’m selling it very well,’ she said.‘Back me up, Tim!’

‘Well, I’m sold,’ said Fiachra.‘I love an auld noise installation.Fuck, that sounded sarcastic.I genuinely do!I went to a great festival in Utrecht last year …’

And then somehow the four of us were chatting about festivals and the music course and our band.I had almost forgotten that Fiachra could be charming and engaging outside his flirting.I had forgotten how fun it was to talk to him about music.It didn’t make me want to go out with him again, but it reminded me why I had gone out with him in the first place, before we both realised he wasn’t ready for a committed relationship.

Then there was a crackle of static and one of the judges clambered onto the makeshift stage holding a microphone.Tadhg and I exchanged glances.

‘Here we go,’ he said.

Please, I thought,please let my instincts be right.I only had another few months left of college, or at least of Trinity, and a part of me wanted to go out with a bang, or at least out with the Ball.

Fiachra’s hand took mine and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

‘And the winner of the 2003 Trinity Battle of the Bands, and a coveted opening slot at this year’s Trinity Ball, is …’

I squeezed Fiachra’s hand back, hard.

‘The Band Laura’s In!’

The room, or at least the bit of it near me, erupted.I flung my arms around Fiachra, who swung me into the air and then kissed me.He put me down and I whirled around to face Tadhg.Our eyes met and then he hugged me tight and said, ‘We did it, Lol.’

I hugged him back.‘We did it!’I turned to Brian and Jo and we wrapped our arms around each other in a big group hug.

Then Katie grabbed me and cried, ‘Come here, rock star!’and the celebrations began.

The rest of the night was a blur of drinks and congratulations.We all laughed at how thrilled we were – it was just a college Battle of the Bands; we hadn’t won the Mercury Prize.But it felt like a real triumph.We ended up in a late bar, the band and a gang of our friends.And Fiachra.When we were leaving the pub at the end of the night, he said, ‘Do you fancy coming back to my place?’

‘Yeah,’ I said.‘I do.’

‘Good,’ he said, looking at the neckline of my dress.‘I’ve been dying to pull down that zipper all night.’

I put my arm around him.‘Never change, Fiachra.’

‘As a psychologist,’ he said, ‘or at least as a future psychologist, I can’t promise that.’

‘Thanks for being my plus-one tonight,’ I said.

‘Any time,’ he said.

The rest of the gang was still hanging around outside the pub, and we said our goodbyes to everyone, Tadhg and Jess last of all.

‘We’re off,’ I said.It felt odd facing them as part of what, to others at least, looked like just another couple, announcing that ‘we’ were heading off.Jess and Fiachra bade each other farewell like old pals.

‘Congratulations again,’ said Fiachra to Tadhg.

‘Thanks, man,’ said Tadhg.He looked at me.‘See you on Saturday?’

‘Of course!’I said.‘We’ve got a ball to practise for.’

Fiachra put his arm around my shoulders as we walked down the road.When we reached the corner I glanced back.Tadhg and Jess were still chatting with a group outside the pub, but as I looked at him he turned his head and our eyes met, just for a second.Then I turned back to Fiachra and kept walking.

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