Page 126 of Our Song

I can’t do winter without you

And though my heart is worn

There’s still a home

There for you

And as an icy cold

Grips my soul

My heart is true

And in a far off state

I’ll always wait

For a sign

You’ll write a melody

That’s just for me

I’ll know it’s mine

I hurt you, love, but I wish you knew

That I was in awe of you

You were my cosmology

My north star, my moon and sea

And I can’t do

Winter without you

I can’t do winter without you

Chapter Thirty-Five

August 2019

‘How are you feeling?’he says.

‘Um, mostly excited,’ I say.‘And a bit nervous.’

‘Don’t be nervous.You’ll be brilliant,’ he says.We’re standing at the side of the main stage at Moveable Feast, ready to go on and play the headline slot on Sunday night in front of a massive field of very excited festivalgoers.‘We’ll be brilliant.’

A tech guy appears and says, ‘Right, everyone, you’re on.’

Sam strolls up and winks at me.‘Good luck!Not that you’ll need it.’

He walks past me and on to the stage followed by Tony, the bass player.As soon as they step out the crowd goes wild.And suddenly I think,Fuck, I can’t do this.I can’t go out and play in front of literally thousands of people.It’d be a lot to go out and play in front of fifty people.But this is the population of a small town.I can feel panic rising.My hands start to shake.

‘Oh shit,’ I say.

But Tadhg takes my hand and gives it a comforting squeeze, and when I look up at his face, the face I’ve woken up next toalmost every morning for the past six months, I know he has total faith in me.And it reminds me that, deep down, I have total faith in myself.

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