Page 75 of I Wish I Would've Warned You

I’m not going home for fall break.

I make a mental note to look up part-time jobs and sublets—anywhere I can go for Thanksgiving or Christmas. Anywhere but there.

“I’ll be back out in a second,” Aidan calls to the girls in the hallway. “Just need to grab a new Sharpie.” He steps inside and closes the door gently behind him, then glances at me. “You got one by chance, Emily?”

“Yeah.” I open my desk drawer and hand him one.

He lingers by the wall, pointing at a row of photos from the Steinbeck Retreat. “I like how this wall’s coming together,” he says. “I’ll have to tell my friend it was worth it to skip you to the front of the line since you enjoyed it so much. Shame some girl got bumped for it, but hey, that’s how connections work, right?”

Wait. What?

Before I can respond, he leans over, presses a light kiss to my mom’s cheek, and slips back into the hallway.

“Oooh!” My mom holds up a framed photo of us outside a Hilton. “I didn’t know you framed this one!”

“What did Aidan mean by skipping me to the front of the line for the Steinbeck Retreat?” I ask, cold.

“Since you’re clearly doing a hotel-motel-hotel pattern on this row...” She stands, holding the photo at arm’s length. “This one works here, right?”

“What the fuck was Aidan talking about, Mother?” I snatch the photo out of her hands. “I know you heard me.”

“I didn’t hear him say anything.” Her poker face is so bad it’s laughable. “All I heard was that he liked your wall.”

“You told me you saved up to pay for that retreat,” I say, voice low. “You said it was your money.”

“I know.”

“So…were you lying?”

She shrugs. “What does it matter? You went to a place you’ve been dreaming about. I just got a little help, that’s all.”

“You didn’t just get help—you used Aidan to rig the system. Someone else didn’t get to go because of me. Do you get that?”

“I don’t see why this matters, Emily. At this point?—”

“It matters,” I cut her off. “Because it wasn’t just a lie. It was another scheme to make yourself feel like the perfect parent. Like you sacrificed something. But it was never about me. It’s never been about me. It’s always about what makes you look good.”

“Of course you belonged there.” She scoffs. “I bet your writing was some of the best in the group.”

“Did you pay for it,” I ask, “or did you use your boyfriend to pull strings and pay for it?”

“Emily...”

“Did you lie to my face, knowing the whole time?”

She offers a weak smile. “I did save up for you to go. But…I didn’t budget well. I had to spend that money on a few other things. When I brought it up with Aidan, he said he knew someone. That someone knew someone else, and...it all worked out.”

Silence.

“Can you leave now?” I ask.

“I thought we were going on the campus tour...”

“I’m sure you’re used to canceling plans with me. Let’s just add that to the list.”

“Emily, you’re making a huge deal out of?—”

“Nothing?” I snap. “You think it’s nothing?”

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