Page 44 of Right Place, Right Time (Second Chances)
Chapter Twenty-One
Kate
“You scared the hell out of me, Casey Evans,” I hiss as soon as the door closes behind Jay.
“Sorry,” she responds in a husky whisper. I’m sure her throat is dry. I look around for a pitcher of water but there isn’t one. I’ll have to remember to tell the nurse to bring one in.
“Sorry isn’t going to cut it.”
I’m well aware that I shouldn’t be scolding my best friend while she’s barely coherent in a hospital bed, but I’m at the end of my rope. I’m close…so close…to losing it, she has no idea. Now that I’ve had time to reflect on the day’s events, I can finally recall the terror I’d felt when I let myself into her bedroom and found her unresponsive. The horrifying thoughts of “Not again, this can’t be happening again!” and the sheer disappointment that I’d even had that thought in the first place.
Casey should have taken better care of herself than this, but she hasn’t. She’s given up. You’d think that after her father passed away and she saw what that did to her mom, she’d reconsider her treatment options. You’d think that she’d find a will to live…to make herself better. If not for the people who love her, than at least for herself. She’s got so much potential. And she’s throwing it all away. I don’t know how she can live with her decisions because I’m pretty sure I can’t anymore.
“What happened?”
“You had a cardiac episode.” Casey flinches. “You nearly arrested in the ambulance on the way to the hospital.”
“Decker?”
I laugh, now she’s worried about Decker? “You’re just lucky he wasn’t around.”
“I kicked him out,” she whispers.
“You what?” I can’t believe my ears. She kicked Decker out? That guy flew across the country to be with her and she kicks him out? At least she has the decency to look upset…remorseful even.
“I’m sorry,” Casey says.
“For what, exactly? For almost dying in our apartment? Not for the first time, I might add. For scaring the shit out of me? Again, not for the first time.” I’m counting her offenses off on my fingers as I list them. “For not telling the guy you aresoobviously in love with that you have a heart condition that you refuse to seek help for? Which one is it, Casey? What exactly are you sorry for?”
Casey closes her eyes—while I recognize that this isn’t the time or the place for this conversation, it’s long overdue. Casey needs some tough love. It’s about time she starts thinking about things on a larger level. Her decisions effect everyone, not just her.
“For everything,” she says finally. “All of that. I’m sorry for all of it.”
I take Casey’s hand, and the tears that were building behind my lids finally break through.
“I love you, Casey. You know that. You’re my best friend. I’ve stood by you through so much, and you’ve stood by me, too. But I can’t do this anymore. I can’t watch you self-destruct. Coming home this afternoon and not being able to wake you up? You were starting to turnblue. I thought it was the end. Theendend. I was so scared.”
Casey opens her eyes and takes in my tear-soaked face. “I’m sorry, Kate.”
“Sorry isn’t good enough, Casey!” I close my eyes tight, immediately sorry for snapping but unable to hold back my frustration.
“Then whatdoyou want me to say?” she snaps back. At least she’s still got some of her feistiness. Makes me feel a little less bad about what I’m about to do.
“Nothing! I don’t want you tosayanything. I want you todo!”
“Well, that’s not going to happen,” my stubborn roommate says quietly.
I shake my head. “I can’t sit by and watch you kill yourself any longer.”
Casey rolls her eyes—yes, she has the nerve to roll her eyes—minimizing my concern for her and my feelings all in one gesture. “That’s a bit dramatic, don’t you think?”
“No, I don’t think it is.”
“I’m not killing myself, Kate. My body is doing a damn good job of that on its own.”
“You’re refusing treatment,” I say, crossing my arms.
“I take my medication,” she bites back.
