Page 18 of Angel's Fall
“He was defending himself.”
“I guess it makes sense that the monster didn’t wish to be discovered. And after the masquerade?”
“When you decided to spy on me?” Christine’s eyes flashed with indignation, but Raoul pushed away his shame.
“I’m glad I did. I saw your face when he called to you through the walls,” Raoul pushed on. He remembered that voice, the incomparable beauty in it, the one blessing God had given this hideous creature. “I saw your joy! The way that musicenflamedyou.”
“Raoul, his voice...” Christine’s defiance faded and she avoided Raoul’s eyes in what had to be shame for her wanton display. “It has power over me. I am not myself when he sings, nor when I sing for him. I cannot explain it.”
“Has he—” Raoul swallowed. There was so much he was afraid to learn, but he had to know. “Has it been, as you said, untoward? Has he used thispowerto compromise you?”
“Do you mean to ask if I am still good? Still pure? You have been so quick to question my virtue lately,” Christine asked back, righteous sparks in her eyes. “He has never compelled me to any sin against my will if that’s what you wish to know. He would never.”
Raoul stared into Christine’s hazel eyes and tried to find deceit there. She’d never been a good liar, even as a child, at least not with him. He saw no sign of falseness now.
“If he has not ruined you, then you can still be free!”
Christine looked even more crestfallen, shaking her head. “That is my tragedy, Raoul,” she sighed. “There’s no escaping. I cannot leave him. I cannot refuse him. I have not been able to since the first time I heard his voice.”
“And how did that happen?” Raoul pushed. “I’m curious how a man becomes an angel.”
“He took pity on me and offered to teach me, when I first came to the Opera,” she answered, voice unsteady. “And I told you, I thought it was a miracle, that he was an angel from heaven. He accepted the mask I gave him. I learned only later that I was wrong.” A sob caught in Christine’s throat, and more of the coldness and resentment that had frozen Raoul’s heart melted away.
“But you went back? Why!”
“For pity, Raoul!” Christine groaned. “You have seen him. You know what he is and when I saw that face after I tore off his mask in fury, I was terrified, but then hewept. He sang. I could not abandon such a tragic creature.”
“He is a villain!” Raoul cried, and another customer at the café shot them a look. Raoul cleared his throat. “The monster lied to you, then made you pity him so you would go back!”
“I went back because I had to! For that pity and that voice and that music, I went back. I swore anew to be his. I have to be if I am to continue in my career!” Christine’s eyes were so bright now. “To live and breathe for music is all I have ever wanted. Don’t you remember? It’s what I promised Papa I would do. My teacher has made my dreams come true. Music is all I have ever lived for and it is all he has ever lived for. Neither of us can give it up.”
“So you still belong to your angel?” Raoul asked softly, mind turning. Of course a monster that ugly, that murderous, could never dream of touching her. It all finally came into place. “But only for music?”
“He insists on it.” Christine glanced around, as if she was used to being watched. “He’s terribly jealous, you see. Not just of you – of any man that might distract me from my music. Fromhis music. Raoul, this is why I cannot marry and I never will.”
“Which is why you have continued to refuse me at every turn, even though it is against the will of your heart,” Raoul surmised slowly. It all – finally – made sense!
“I had no choice,” Christine lamented.
“And Rameau?” Raoul asked, and Christine looked down. “That’s why he’s made you take on that charade. So no man would pursue you and you can remain dedicated to music and to him.”
“I have made a vow to him, Raoul, to serve music alone. As long as I do that, I am safe.” Christine looked into his eyes at last with terrifying intensity. “Youremain safe.”
Raoul’s blood froze as another puzzle piece fell into place. “You have been protecting me all along, haven’t you?”
“He is more dangerous than you can understand.”
“Oh, I understand how dangerous he is. Better than you ever will,” Raoul snarled, and Christine looked taken aback. He wanted to tell her, wanted her toknowthat her angel and jailer had the blood of Raoul’s family on his hands.
“But now there is at least a chance I can save you for good,” Christine said, pulling Raoul back.
“How?” Raoul balked. It was absurd, for he was the one who was meant to save her, now more than ever.
“You are leaving in two weeks, are you not?” Christine asked carefully. All hope fell out of Raoul’s chest like a mishandled plate clattering to the floor and smashing.
“I can’t leave now! Not knowing you are in such danger and that this fiend walks free!” Raoul cried so loudly that several other patrons turned to look at them.
“You must!” Christine hissed, grabbing Raoul’s hands and holding him tight. Her eyes were wild with fear. “Raoul, youhave to go. For my sake! I can live knowing you are out there in the world, free on your adventures, holding your love for me in your heart. It’s the only way I can go on.”
