Page 132 of The Grumpy Billionaire

“This old thing?” Lola says.

“Are you being funny?” Kelsey says. “I know what a real fur coat feels like. Back in my youth I used to pretend I was rich and go to nice stores and try them on.”

I introduce Pico to Kelsey, since Lola is really off her game. “We were just going to…” I say.

Lola and Pico exchange glances. Something secret is definitely going on.

“Wait! Hold the phone.” Kelsey grabs Lola’s hand. “What. The. Fuck.”

I look down at the massive rock on Lola’s hand.

“It’s not what you think!” Lola says.

“I don’t know what to think,” I say.

“I’m going with secret engagement,” Kelsey says. She looks at Pico, but I happen to know Pico’s happily married. Lola has talked about how much he loves his wife.

“I know my bling. This is Saudi-prince-level shit,” Kelsey says. “Tell all.”

“Fuck!” Lola says, exchanging glances with Pico.

“You have to tell them,” Pico says.

“We’re tricking Roger,” Lola confesses. “He thinks I’m engaged to Wulfric and that Wulfric wants to kill him.”

“What?” I say. “Is Wulfric in on it, too?”

“No! Don’t tell him!”

“Don’t worry,” I say.

“It’s so stupid, but Wulfric gave me this heirloom family diamond to put in his safety-deposit box one time, and I put it on. It was just so beautiful, and so I wore it while I did errands before hitting the bank, and I ran into Roger, and he went ballistic when he saw it. So I told him it’s Wulfric’s family’s ring, which it is, and that Wulfric and I have a secret engagement. The way it backed him off, it was like magic.”

Pico grins. “The man is a piece of shit, but he’s heard the rumors about Wulfric.”

“And Pico has been so cool. He got the idea to get a fake copy made so I can wear it around.”

“It’s a famous ring,” Pico says. “I guarantee you, Roger looked it up online.”

Lola looks at Pico. “Sometimes we pull this coat out of Wulfric’s storage and I wear it when I think Roger might be shadowing me.”

“Another heirloom?” Kelsey asks.

Lola nods.

“You think Roger’s out there?” I ask.

“He’s watching us right now,” Pico says. “Don’t look around. Don’t show we know.”

“I want to see him! I want to punch him,” Kelsey says.

“Don’t. We’re good. Wulfric is an amazing deterrent,” Lola says.

Pico says, “I’ve let Roger know in so many words that Wulfric is looking for an excuse to kill him—painfully.” He crosses his arms. “Delivering threatening messages to Roger is one of my favorite pastimes. I’ve told him what Wulfric plans to do if he comes within a hundred feet of Lola or shows up anywhere near her new place. My wife had a stalker. We’re both very sympathetic.”

“I think it’s working,” Lola says. “Roger’s out there, but he’s really backed off.”

Pico grins. “The man is scared shitless of Wulfric.”

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