Page 108 of The Grumpy Billionaire

“Twelve thirty?” Jane says. “Will that work? Is this thing deadlining?”

“No, I got it.”

“Trouble in chia paradise?” Hesh asks.

“Okay…” I lean in and lower my voice. “I’m gonna tell you this but it’s not for general broadcast.”

“Wait…” Hesh does a comical double take. “Wait…no.”

I smile enigmatically.

Jane leans in closer, red hair blazing. “You and Hugh-dini?”

“Ummm…yes!”

They look dumbstruck.

“I can’t believe it!”

“Just to clarify—doing it,” Hesh says.

“Hesh!” Jane says. “She doesn’t have to go into details. Unless she wants to.” She turns to me. “Like if there were some...sharable things. But she doesn’t have to.”

“Youand Hugh-dini,” Hesh says with disbelief.

“Well, is itthatshocking?” Jane says.

“What? Hugh-dini goes after you know, leggy blonde finance bro-ettes who may or may not be ultra-high-functioning androids designed to look like supermodels. Not that Stella, you know—”

“Just stop talking,” Jane says.

“I’m just saying Stella isn’t a leggy blonde android,” Hesh protests. “Stella is a hottie in her own way—”

“Oh my god! Zip it!” Jane says.

“It’s fine. I don’t want to be a leggy finance bro-ette.”

“So…what happened? Did you guys bond over an annoying research project?” Jane asks.

“Here’s the thing—we knew each other as kids. I wanted to tell you all month, but certain family members told me it was this big secret. Hugo was my brother’s best friend when they were kids. He and I didn’t really have much to do with each other, honestly, but then he helped me get this job—”

“He was your brother’s best friend?” Jane asks. “Okay, we are gonna need a three-hour martini lunch to get through the gossip quotient here.”

“Hugh-dini was a kid?” Hesh jokes.

Jane chucks a paperclip at his face.

“A very serious kid,” I say. “And don’t worry—I didn’t breathe a word of Hugh-dini, a name that is completely hilarious, for the record.”

Tinley wanders up. Hesh points at me and mouths the wordlunch.

Needless to say, the three of them pump me for details over lunch. I’m not one to kiss and tell, but there’s a lot to tell outside of kissing. I also omit the Chewbacca attack, and the truth about pineapple. Hugo’s right—Wulfric can never find out.

Tinley fills us in on the Lola gossip—apparently Lola’s stalker ex-boyfriend, Roger, got her kicked out of where she’s living—the man broke into her apartment. She and her roommate weren’t there at the time, luckily.

“The man’s dangerous,” Jane tells me. “He’s a bouncer at this horrible club in Soho. A big guy. I feel like there’s a bad story there.”

“Poor Lola,” I say. “Doesn’t she have a restraining order against him or anything?”

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