Page 109 of Against All Odds

Only I don’t want her to go home. I want her to stay here, to curl up on the couch. I want to hold her, like we did the night she found out she was pregnant. I want to be her comfort, her safe place, and tell her how much I want to make this work.

However, minutes pass and Violet doesn’t come out. I head back to the door, hand ready to knock when her panicked voice screams. “Everett!” I push the door open to find her sitting on the toilet, tears in her eyes. “I’m bleeding.”

I’m pacing outside of the hospital room. The doctor is in there with Violet now, and I’m just trying to keep myself calm.

When we got here, they didn’t seem all that concerned. I didn’t comprehend the fact that they weren’t immediately wheeling her back and doing something.

One would think that I would understand, more than most, that if she’s miscarrying, there’s nothing they can do to stop it. She’s still early into her pregnancy, and this would just be a sad reality.

All that knowledge went right out the fucking door because it’s Violet.

She was scared and I was fucking terrified. I’ve never felt more helpless than I did as I was driving her to the hospital.

The doctor exits and I come to a halt. “You can come in.”

“Is she . . .”

“I can’t disclose anything, but Violet is waiting for you.”

Right, privacy laws and all that shit. Hopefully this will be the last time this is an issue when it comes to Violet.

I open the door, steeling myself. No matter what she tells me, I will be stoic and be there for her.

Violet turns her head when I walk in. I don’t speak, and then she gives me a soft smile. “It’s just some spotting.”

Relief floods me and I move to her bed, taking her hands in mine. “And she’s okay?” I ask the doctor. She must have followed right behind me. “She’s pregnant? The baby is fine? Everything is all right?”

“She’s doing well. This is very normal. The cramping and the spotting can happen, and it’s nothing to worry about.”

Nothing to worry about? I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone that regarding blood, but she seems confident in her assessment.

“What do we have to watch for? Does she need to stay in bed?” I ask.

“Nope, none of that.”

Violet squeezes my hands. “It’s really okay. Dr. Cowles said everything looks fine, but just to be sure, she’d like to do an ultrasound, and we can also hear the heartbeat. Do you want to ... be in here?”

I stare down at her, my own heart rate accelerating. “Are you sure?”

I don’t know why I ask that since she called me in here, but I can’t help but feel like this is a monumental moment for her, and to share it together must mean something.

“Everett,” she says on a soft sigh. “Of course I’m sure.”

“Then, yes, I would love nothing more.”

Dr. Cowles smiles. “Okay, let’s hear your baby’s heartbeat.”

She heads out of the room and wheels in the ultrasound machine. Once it’s set up, she explains where exactly the wand is going, puts some lube on the end, and then we start to see the screen.

Neither of us move, and I hold Violet’s hands as we wait. Dr. Cowles points to the smallest speck on the screen. “This is your baby, and that right there is the sac. Everything looks perfectly normal.”

I stare at the monitor, completely transfixed, and then the room is filled with a whomping noise.

The heartbeat.

Whomp. Whomp. Whomp. Whomp. It beats over and over, and I swear my chest expands so large I can’t breathe.

It’s the most beautiful sound in the world.

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