Page 126 of Tempting Promises
“You don’t like heights,” I remind him.
“Says you.”
“Says you!”
His grin is wide. “Go to work, Charlotte.”
“Get off my roof, Rowan.”
He puts the hammer down and sits, watching me. “Are you ready to let me in and help you?”
My chest tightens, and I bite my tongue. My immediate reaction is to tell him to go the hell away and I can do this on my own. I always do. It’s who I am and what I’ve had to learn to do. It’s years and years of disappointment and heartache built into my chest.
“I just need some time,” I say, and he nods.
“I’ll be here when you’re ready.”
Then Rowan turns back to his knees, picks up his hammer and doesn’t look at me again while my self-loathing goes even higher.
Seriously, what is wrong with me?
“You need time for what? The man was on your roof,” Faye says as she tosses popcorn in her mouth. She returned home yesterday, came by to bring me a gift, and ended up listening to me drone on and on about the mess I’m in.
“My head is a mess. The last thing I want to do is say something stupid and lose him for good. I just...I need to think. To get my stupid emotions in check.”
She shrugs. “I mean, mature and all, I guess. How long do you think Rowan is willing to deal with your need for space?”
“I don’t know.”
“Why didn’t you tell me you needed money?”
I grab a cookie and sigh. “Because you’d give it to me, and I don’t want that. I never want to be in debt to the people I love.”
“Did you ever think it’s not a debt to those people? That it’ssomeone who loves you and wants to help? If it was me, would you offer and help?”
“Of course I would.”
She slaps my arm. “Well, dumb-dumb, why the hell do you think I wouldn’t?”
“Faye, you don’t have a job. I love you and you’re the most giving human in the world, but, like...how?”
“I have money, Charlotte. I know you think me being a beauty ambassador isn’t a thing, but I make a lot of money. I have contracts with all these brands that not only pay me but also send me stuff. It’s a pretty sweet gig.”
I knew she was doing a lot, but she’s never mentioned the ins and outs. “I should’ve come to you,” I admit.
“Yeah, but even more, let’s say I couldn’t afford to help you, I’m still your best friend. I would’ve shouldered some of your stress and been someone you could cry to.”
I take her hand, squeezing once. “I’m sorry.”
“You should be.”
We both laugh. “I don’t know what I do now.”
“Is it too late to save it? I’ll give you the money,” Faye says, squeezing my hand back. “I’ll help without question.”
She’s incredibly sweet to offer, and it’s not pride that stops me from saying yes, it’s really not. It’s more that I worry that, if I take her up on this, in a few months, I’ll be right back in this same position. My farm hasn’t been profitable in years. I’ve struggled since I took it over, and without that contract, it would be like putting a Band-Aid on a stab wound.
“I love you for it, but I really do need time to think through my options. I love this farm, so much, but I don’t love farming, if that makes sense.”
