Page 114 of Broken Dreams
Not for real anyway, but I’m going to hate losing him.
* * *
“Oh, Addison, darling, this place looks amazing,” my mother-in-law says as she looks around the house. The last time she was here was about a year ago and I definitely wasn’t settled.
“It’s really become a home,” I tell her.
She walks over to the side table where there’s a picture of Isaac and me holding Elodie the day she was born. It’s one of my favorite photos in the world. “He would love this.” I don’t say anything but a piece of my chest aches. “He would really want you to be happy and living on, even if he can’t be here.”
He would. Isaac didn’t believe in love being selfish and we would laugh often because I would tell him if I died, I didn’t want him to be happy for at least a set time. It was only fair. He disagreed and hoped I found love immediately.
I just don’t know how he could’ve ever thought it was possible to do. He was the only man I ever loved. The only man I’ve ever been with and it took me three years to finally be ready to try again.
I try really hard not to think about the fact that this would not be his idea of moving on, but I think he’d understand.
Maybe.
“I’m trying,” I admit to her.
Elodie comes in holding her baby doll that Judy bought her. “I have baby!”
Judy smiles. “I see, did you name her?”
“Baby.”
I fight back the laugh sitting in my throat.
“You named the baby, Baby?” Judy asks.
“Her name is Baby,” Elodie informs her with pride in her little voice.
“Okay then.”
And then my little firecracker is gone and running out the door to find something else to show her.
Judy and I sit in the living room, waiting for her return, and she places her hands in her lap. “Addy?”
“Yes?”
“Are you happy with this new guy?”
I have to hand it to her, she waited a whole lot longer than I thought. I was prepared for this deep conversation in the car on the way here, but nothing, just small talk and about Brielle and Spencer. Then, we got here, settled her in, and still not a word about Grady.
I was just starting to relax. I should’ve known better.
However, of all the lies I’ve told, Judy is the one person who doesn’t deserve it. She is a second mother to me. All my life, she’s supported and loved me. This all ends in a few days if he gets the funding, and I really don’t want to see her endure the pain of our falsehood.
I go to open my mouth to tell her the truth, but she beats me to it.
“Don’t say anything, please. I debated talking about this with you, and Brielle urged me not to, said that she met him and liked him. That you are finally getting out there and no matter what, it’s your choice. I think it’s just that, you’ve always been part mine.” She smiles and tilts her head. “You’ve been coming to my house since you were a little girl with those four boys. There’s not a time in Isaac’s life that you weren’t right at his side. I came because I wanted to meet him. I shouldn’t have changed my plans because of that.”
“Mom,” I say, needing her to stop. “My relationship with Grady is complicated.”
“Life is complicated, isn’t it?”
That’s an understatement.
“It is.”
