Page 95 of Forbidden Hearts
He hits me again at the same time that he pulls back, almost leaving me empty. Then right after, he pushes deep, and I scream out his name. An orgasm rockets through me so fast I can’t stay up. I begin to crumple, but he holds me where he wants me, driving at a pace that seems inhuman. Asher slams into me. Once. Twice. And then he groans, murmuring my name over and over.
The two of us are panting as we fall to the mattress, and he reaches for me, pulling me to his chest and kissing my forehead.
We clean up, he tosses the condom, and I wash up a little. Then we walk hand-in-hand back to bed. I curl up against his chest, listening to the steady thrum of his heart.
“I’m glad you came.”
“Because of the sex?”
I should say yes. It would be the smart response, but I remember his confessions when we were overcome with desire. How he was almost angry at his feelings, and I don’t want to lie to him. I’ve had enough of those with men.
Our situation is what it is, a short-term affair that we both know the ending of. It sucks because it can never be more while also having the potential to be everything. What it can be is honest and heartbreaking at the same time.
“No, not because of the sex.” I trail my fingers over his chest, making patterns of nothing. “Because I missed you too.”
“This is . . .”
I look up, his eyes finding mine, and he doesn’t have to finish it. “I know.”
He brushes my hair back and then rests his palm against my cheek. “I have never flown thousands of miles for anyone, Phoebe. I have never craved someone the way I do you. I know we only have a month, but fuck, I don’t want to miss any time together.”
“And what happens when I leave? Because I have to go, you understand that, right? No matter how I feel, I can’t stay in Sugarloaf.”
Asher gives me a lopsided grin. “I would never let you. You have a life to live and people to help. That means you going to finish your degree. I just want to have all the time I can.”
“I want that too.”
“Then, when you’re home, stay with me every night. Stay and let me have what I can so, when you go, there are no regrets.”
I lay my head back down on his chest and squeeze my arm tighter. When I go, I worry leaving will be my regret because in just a few weeks, I have fallen for Asher Whitlock.
Fuck me is right.
twenty-four
PHOEBE
“The campus was amazing,” Asher says as we walk back toward our hotel, his hand in mine.
“It really was. I can see myself there, which I know seems funny because it’s not like I’m swimming in options. I just . . . I liked it. I liked the professors a lot too. They seemed excited about me possibly attending.”
“Your professor in Iowa really sang your praises.” He smiles. “I didn’t realize you had all those honors.”
I shake my head. “I gave all that up by leaving, though.”
Speaking of leaving, we leave soon, back to the world where I can’t sit with him at the restaurant or touch him as we walk anywhere.
As much as I love every second of this, I hate it too.
It gave me a glimpse of a life we can never have.
“Has Olivia ever seen you with a woman?” I ask as he puts the key in the door. His hand freezes, and he looks to me with a panicked expression.
“Why?”
“I’m just curious.”
Asher gets the door open after another attempt, and when we enter, his demeanor shifts a bit. “No.”
