Page 114 of Forbidden Hearts
PHOEBE
“This is the fetus.” Lucy points to the screen. “I’m doing some measuring now.”
Tears continue to streak down my face. I’m pregnant.
This just . . . can’t be real.
The little heartbeat on the screen and a very strange looking alien tells me it is, though. I can’t speak or even comprehend what’s happening. However, I do know the baby on the screen looks like a baby, and there’s no way this baby is only two or three weeks old. There are arms, legs, and a little head.
Lucy finishes, places the wand back on the machine, and helps me sit up. I have to ask, even though I really don’t want to know. I would rather pretend that the truth didn’t just appear on the screen.
“How far along am I?”
“You’re about eleven weeks,” she says, and the ache in my chest is too much. I struggle to catch my breath, and then Lucy’s hand is on my back, her face is close to mine, and she’s urging me to breathe.
If I’m eleven weeks, then this is so much worse than I thought. This baby isn’t Asher’s. This baby belongs to another man, a man who ruined my life and has a family of his own.
All of this . . . I just can’t take it.
Lucy keeps talking, trying to get me to calm down, but everything is spiraling so fast. Eventually, I’m able to focus on her voice, and I do as she says, inhaling through my nose and exhaling through my mouth. I repeat it, over and over, until I finally stop gasping.
“Okay?” Lucy asks, hand still resting on my back.
I nod. “As much as I can be.”
“You were in Iowa eleven weeks ago.”
“Yes.”
“You have options, Phoebe. You’re still within your first trimester. You just . . . need to make a decision.”
“How? How did I not know? I’m not stupid. I’m in the medical field. I understand how all this works, and yet, I’m eleven weeks pregnant.”
“You bled, that is how. You’re on the pill, you had what you assumed was a period, and you were also under extreme stress, which would’ve affected your cycle. I know you’re not stupid, Phoebe, you’re human.”
“I don’t even know where I go from here,” I confess.
“You go home, cry it out, and then make a choice. You’re not alone, and you have the support of friends and family, no matter what you decide.”
“I have to tell him,” I say, not even sure which him I’m referring to. Both, I guess. I don’t know that I have to tell Asher, but a part of me doesn’t think I could keep it from him. He’s my safe place, and I’m going to lose that. “I have to tell both of them, don’t I?”
Why would Asher ever want to be with me now? I’m pregnant with another man’s baby.
“You don’t have to tell anyone anything until you’re ready. As for Asher, I don’t know what to say. It’s not his baby, so there’s no reason to disclose this information unless you want to.”
I drop my face in my hands, feeling worse than I did when that photo was posted. At least I knew I would come out of that at the end of the day without any scars. This time, I can’t run away, avoid the issue, or pretend it never happened. I will forever be altered.
“How do you tell the man you love, who you’ve been sleeping with for a month, that you’re pregnant with another man’s baby?”
“I really don’t know.”
No, because most people don’t end up in a mess like this. “Right.”
“Would you like to talk to someone beforehand?”
“Talk to someone?”
“Brenna Arrowood is on staff for any patient of mine. I could—”
