Page 208 of Keep This Promise
“Why don’t you nap?”
“I can’t. Fuck, I can’t, Sophie. I can’t close my eyes without seeing Eden limp in my arms. She looks so much like my sister, and then to see her that way . . . I have to fix this. I have to make sure she’s okay. I lost my sister because of this, and I can’t let the same thing happen to Eden. I’m a doctor. It is my job to notice when something is wrong, and I didn’t see it in my own child. I’m so fucking sorry.”
My jaw shakes, and there is this new pain in my chest from seeing him upset like this. “I was so scared. I should’ve known something was wrong.”
His hands move to my shoulders. “You did nothing wrong.”
“You said you missed it, but so did I. Do you think I shoulder the blame?”
His eyes never leave mine. “Of course not.”
“Well, then how would I blame you? I know you love Eden. You’d never let anything hurt her—or me. You’ve been our champion, and I can’t bring myself to think of what would have happened if not for you. Why do you feel it’s your fault? How long has Eden been in your life? Months. That’s it. I’ve had her three years, and I didn’t notice her symptoms were more than just her having trouble adjusting to the upheaval to our lives.”
The tears fall as my guilt crushes my chest. I’m aware that he’s a doctor and trained to see medical issues, but I’m her mother. The one who gave her life and knows her best. All this time, I’ve been explaining away issues, and it could’ve killed her. I never would’ve known to bring her to the hospital.
I bring my hands to his face. “You knew what it was, and you saved our daughter, Holden. I would’ve brought her home and put her to bed, and then what would’ve happened?”
His lids close, and I feel his jaw tighten beneath my touch. “She could’ve died.”
“But, instead, she’s resting and getting the treatment she desperately needs.”
His forehead falls to mine, and I let this moment settle over me. Right here, the two of us are tucked away from the horrors of the world. The last day has been a series of highs and lows, and my feelings are a bit too close to the surface as I let my tears fall.
Holden’s thumb brushes against my cheek. “Don’t cry, Sophie.”
“I was so afraid. I knew you would do what you could, but I was so afraid.”
“I will always do what I can for you both, I promise.”
The room is growing warmer as emotions threaten to overwhelm me, but then Holden’s promise settles over me, soothing the storm a bit.
He moves his face a little closer, rubbing his nose against mine. I want him to kiss me again. I need him to absorb everything around me and take away the fear and pain.
So, I do what I know will do exactly that, I kiss him.
Holden responds in an instant, his hands cupping my face as his mouth moves over mine. This kiss is exactly like the one we shared in the car, only this time I won’t be stopping him. I need this. I have to shut off my brain for just a little bit.
“Sophie.” He sighs my name as he kisses down my cheek. “Tell me to stop.”
“Don’t.”
His hot kisses move to the other side as he makes his way up my neck. The heat of his breath on my ear causes me to shiver. “I want to rip these clothes off you and kiss every inch of your body. I’m not in control. I want you, need you so fucking much. I can’t say no, but . . .”
“But what?” My voice is shaky as need builds.
“I won’t be able to be the man you need.”
I push his face back, looking in his eyes. “I just need you, however you are. Please, Holden.”
“This is your last chance, Sophie.” He slides his nose down my cheek, his voice sending shivers down my spine. “I won’t be able to hold back.”
My breathing is ragged, and I don’t care. I want him too much to care. “Please.”
ChapterTwenty-Three
HOLDEN
Her plea takes every reason I had to stop this away. I want her so much that it’s an ache inside me.
