Page 70 of Keep This Promise
“No. I have been going over the blood tests and wanted to see the results of the most recent one before Jeff got them. He’s a good doctor, but I know him well enough to know that he’ll hide things for my own good.”
“Do they look better?”
The deep sigh tells me they don’t. “This is from six hours ago, and they’re what I expect, but not ideal. She’s stable, which is the most important thing. She’ll get fluids, and we’ll give her more potassium, so that will help. We will do several blood sugar tests today. Some before meals, some after.”
“And what about her life? Does she live normal with this? Is this something I did? Maybe in my pregnancy?”
“You did nothing. If anything, it could be me. My sister had Type I Diabetes, and it’s often genetic. Jesus, I didn’t even think. I just . . . fuck.”
I watch as the agony rolls across his face in waves. “It’s neither of our faults, Holden.”
I’m not sure he believes me, but at least his gaze finds mine again. “Maybe not, but I promise, Sophie, she will have a normal life, just things we need to watch with her food. It’ll seem daunting at first, but then it’ll become part of our everyday life.”
Our.
Even after what happened, he still puts us as a unit. It makes me want to crawl into his lap and let him wrap me in his arms. I’m trying so hard to hold on to my flimsy excuse because I am unsure of the future.
Not like anyone ever knows, but it’s too hard to think about losing Holden.
I clear my throat, lifting the bundle of clothes. “The nurse said you have somewhere I could change?”
That causes him to look at himself. “Shit. I should do the same. I look like hell.”
“You’ve had a lot happen in the last twenty-four hours.”
The quirk in his lip makes my heart flutter. “You can say that.”
I wonder if he’s thinking about the kiss too.
No, I will not think about the kiss or him or us.
Holden points to the door. “There is a bathroom through there. I’ll do the same and then head down to Eden.”
Pushing my thoughts down, I return his smile. “Cheers.”
“Of course.”
I walk into the bathroom and flip the small lock on the doorknob. There is a stall shower in the corner, a toilet, and sink. Underneath, Holden has a set of clear plastic drawers. There are some hygiene items like a toothbrush, deodorant, a comb. I would love to brush my teeth at least, and thankfully, there is a spare.
I clean myself up before changing into the scrubs the nurse lent me. When I leave the bathroom, Holden is sitting on the sofa in his office, head in his hands, and...shirtless. He doesn’t look up as I approach him, and then I hear the faint snore.
Poor man is so exhausted he’s sleeping sitting up. I place my hand on his shoulder, careful not to startle him, and he lifts his head.
“What? Are you okay?”
“Yes, I’m fine. You fell asleep.” I clear my throat and look at his naked chest. “And mid clothing change.”
“I just—” He pauses. “I figured I would wait for you to get done and then try a cold shower to wake up.”
“Why don’t you nap?”
“I can’t. Fuck, I can’t, Sophie. I can’t close my eyes without seeing Eden limp in my arms. She looks so much like my sister, and then to see her that way . . . I have to fix this. I have to make sure she’s okay. I lost my sister because of this, and I can’t let the same thing happen to Eden. I’m a doctor. It is my job to notice when something is wrong, and I didn’t see it in my own child. I’m so fucking sorry.”
My jaw shakes, and there is this new pain in my chest from seeing him upset like this. “I was so scared. I should’ve known something was wrong.”
His hands move to my shoulders. “You did nothing wrong.”
“You said you missed it, but so did I. Do you think I shoulder the blame?”
