Page 32 of Help Me Remember
Emmett nods. “Go, she’s safe.”
He walks out, and my anxiety spikes again. With an intensity I don’t understand, I want him to stay. It’s enough to start to drag me out of the fog of panic. Why do I want Spencer to be here when Emmett and my imposter boyfriend are?
Before I can think too much, Henry sits beside me. “I’m sorry I scared you.”
I force the air out of my lungs. “It’s fine. I’m tired and overwhelmed. It’s been a rough few days, which you’d know if you’d been here.”
Henry flinches slightly, and I don’t really care. “That’s why I came.”
“To do what?”
“Apologize.”
Emmett clears his throat. “On that note, I’ll give you guys a few minutes alone. I’m going back across the hall. If you need anything, just yell.”
“Thank you, Em,” I say, and he winks.
“Why is he across the hall?”
I sigh heavily, not wanting to explain any of this to him. “It doesn’t matter. Why did you come tonight? I didn’t answer your messages because I was upset. You could’ve waited for me to text.”
“Because I needed to see you. I got worried when you weren’t answering your phone.”
“I really didn’t want to talk. You weren’t here when my brother was buried, Henry. That was when I needed someone to talk to, someone to offer me their support.”
He at least looks embarrassed. “Yes, and I know I failed you.”
“That’s the thing, though. I don’t know that you actually did.”
“What does that mean?”
Jesus. I really don’t want to get into this now, I don’t want to talk to him about all the things my gut is screaming at me, but letting this go on any longer is unacceptable. If he and I are still together, well, he needs to know it isn’t what I want. So, if this is what it took for me to finally leave him, being knocked—literally in the head, then so be it. I am smart enough to walk away before I spend any more time with him.
This type of a relationship is not okay, and I deserve more.
“I know you’re not supposed to tell me anything about the last few years, but I keep feeling like this isn’t real. Us. I don’t think that we’re together, but if we are, I’m not sure we should be.”
Henry’s lips part. “What makes you say that? Because I had to work?”
“No, not because you had to work. Because there aren’t any photos of us anywhere, none of your clothing is here, and I can’t find a single thing that would make me think you’re still part of my life. The last thing I remember about us is that I was unhappy and wanted to end things.”
He rises and starts to pace. Something he always did when he was trying to come up with something to change my mind. “We did end things.”
Finally.Finally, the truth.
“That’s why my mom didn’t call you immediately?”
He nods. “Yes, I would’ve been at the hospital immediately. I never stopped loving you, Brie. Not for a single moment. So, when she told me what happened, I hoped, God, I hoped that maybe this would be our second chance. That I could prove to you that I am the guy you want to be with.”
I’m not sure how he thought using this to manipulate me was a good idea.
“So, you lied?”
“Yes, but I didn’t like the idea of it. Your mom told me I needed to keep things from you, so I did. I lied because it was what you remembered and I hoped that it was because it was what you wanted.”
A part of me understands it. Here was a chance to rewrite our history, but the issue is that we were going to end here anyway.
“I don’t know how things went before, but I know that I want so much more than this. I want someone who will be by my side, especially in the hard times.”
