Page 133 of Could Have Been Us
“We’ll keep getting better.”
I slide my hand into his. “Together we will.”
“We’ll go back to my place, stay there a few days, and figure it out.”
“Okay.” I don’t have the strength to argue anyway. “What about Oliver?”
“He’s already moving his stuff over to your place.”
I chuckle softly, thinking of my poor brother, shuffling back and forth because he would do anything for me. I close my eyes, focusing on the feel of Jack’s hand in mine.
“I love you, Jack.”
“I love you too.”
And I know he does. In the depths of my soul, I believe we can survive as long as I have him beside me.
* * *
Oliver did his best to clean up, but the cabin is still a mess. Not that I care. I feel the way this room looks . . . haggard.
“Do you want anything to eat?”
“Do we know if there’s anything here?” I ask with a raised brow. “We should remember who has been staying here while you were with me.”
“Goldilocks your brother is not.”
I try to smile, but I don’t know what it looks like. “No, he’s not.”
“Well, how about we see what we have and then go soak.”
I sigh through my nose and nod. “Okay.”
I’m doing a really shitty job of keeping it together. I wish I had the emotional capacity to care, but I don’t. The truth is, I left part of my heart in Georgia today, and the new rhythm is off balance.
We enter the kitchen and find some cheese in the fridge, so I grab the crackers from the cabinet. Tomorrow, we’ll need food, but for tonight, this will be perfect.
Jack and I toss it onto a plate, giving zero fucks about how it looks. When we get to the back deck where the hot tub sits on, he turns on the jets.
The sound is loud as the bubbles come to life. I stare at them, thinking of how I feel the same. The air forcing the water to move the way it doesn’t want to. I’m not sure how long I stare before I feel Jack behind me.
“Let me help you,” he says softly. His hands move to my cardigan, pulling it down my shoulders and then arms. I’ve kept it wrapped around me, clinging to it as though it could hold my broken bits in place.
There’s nothing sexual about him undressing me. It’s careful and measured. Each item gets folded and placed on the chair.
I’m standing here in my bra and underwear, looking at the bubbling water. Jack must’ve removed his clothes because I feel his hand at my back.
“Come on, Stella. Let’s go in.”
He’s completely naked as he climbs the stairs, which snaps me out of my daze.
I remove my bra and slide my underwear down before hurrying to get in because shivers are starting to run through me.
I sink down into the hot water. Once I’m covered up to my chest, my teeth start to chatter.
What is wrong with me? I’m falling apart, and I’m not that girl.
I’m the one who handles whatever life throws because there’s no other choice, not the one who can’t think of anything other than the incredible pain in her chest.
