Page 27 of Return to Us
“I will always love you, Gray. Always.”
And I would. He was the first boy I ever loved, gave myself to, and trusted to keep me safe, which he did. This moment was the only thing about us that I would regret. However, I knew it was the right choice. Grayson was destined for greatness, and he wouldn’t achieve it if I was around.
Not only that, I needed to leave here. I couldn’t stay and be like my mother. I couldn’t love a man, give up my dreams, and then be left when he realized I wasn’t enough.
“Don’t do this. Don’t walk away. We’ll figure it out.”
“I have a plane ticket for Massachusetts. I’m leaving tonight.”
He stepped toward me. “Tonight? You knew? You . . . you came here, we just . . . and you’re leaving?”
I needed him. I needed the memory of us and all the love we shared. I was a coward, and even knowing that, I didn’t care. Grayson Parkerson owned my heart, but it was time I owned my future.
“I know I promised you a lot and that I’m letting you down. I’m sorry. I have to go, and I have to try to find myself.”
His hands balled into fists and then released. “Fine. I’m here, trying to fight to keep you when it’s clear you don’t want me to. I want to fight and win and keep you!”
The last sixty minutes had been the hardest time in my life. I came to tell him goodbye, and ended up in his arms, kissing, touching, making love, and that was when I knew that it had to be now.
“I guess some things just aren’t meant to be won in a fight.”
Neither of us had a clue what life really was or the hardships that lay ahead. Naivety is a gift for the young. We allowed it to cloak us in ignorance and make us believe things were so much easier than they really were.
Not that I feel I was ever as blissfully ignorant as the Parkersons were. They lived in their gilded castle with new cars and heat each month. Where I swept the floor and learned that duct tape really could fix anything if you tried enough and wearing layers warded off the chill.
With Grayson, though, I was never cold, and that scared me more than anything. My mother once lived in that state of dependence.
I would not be her.
“Maybe not won, but cherished isn’t such a bad thing,” I say, not wanting to go back to something I can’t fix.
His lip quirks, and then he stands, pulling the covers up over me. “No, it’s not a bad thing.” He leans in, kissing my forehead tenderly. “Rest, and if you need anything, I’m just a call away.”
“Thanks for everything,” I say, the sleepiness starting to creep back in, tugging at my eyelids. I slip down into the warm blankets, feeling as though I’m already asleep. “I love you, Gray. I always have.” I think to myself.
“Sleep, we’ll talk soon.”
“Soon.”
His warm breath slides across my cheek. “I always will.”
Chapter 7
Grayson
“Parkerson, get the hose on the first floor just for good measure,” Chief yells as my crew redirects the water to where he indicated. It’s been a crazy night. We had two false alarms back to back and now a structure fire.
“Jack, get it higher,” I direct.
He nods, lifting the nozzle a bit more. When we got here, the fire was out of control, but after the work of my truck and two others, we’ve finally got it contained. Luckily, the fire alarms woke the family and everyone got out safely.
There’re just a few small hot spots remaining, and I’m beat.
We work to get those out and shut the water down. Jack groans, his head falling back as he stares up. “This was a tough one.”
I nod, grabbing two water bottles and tossing one to him. “No shit.”
“Remind me again why I let you convince me to do this . . .”
