Page 139 of The One for Me
Her beautiful eyes shut, sending another stream down her face. “All I want is to drop this box and fuse myself to you. I want to beg you to stay even though I know you can’t.”
I shift, letting my hand drop as my heart pounds relentlessly. “I can stop playing.”
“No.” She shakes her head. “Absolutely not, Sean Arrowood. Baseball is your child. I wouldn’t ask you to stop playing for the same reasons you wouldn’t ask me to leave Austin behind.”
“Baseball isn’t everything.”
“No, but you’re not ready to give it up.”
“I would for you.”
“I won’t let you.”
And that’s where my final Hail Mary begins and ends. Not to mention, if I broke my contract, it would cost me millions of dollars in penalties. All of this is so fucked.
My brother makes his way over and takes the box from her hands. “I’ll go talk to Austin while you two say goodbye.” She looks up at him with so much pain that Jacob winces before dropping a kiss to her temple. “Take your time.”
There is no time. That’s the fucking problem. I have a few weeks left here before my time is up and so is everything that matters in my life. I will have to walk away, and I feel as though my heart is tearing from my chest.
I love her. She’s everything good in my world, and she’s leaving. My world will never be the same again.
“I don’t know how to say goodbye to you.”
There is no barrier between us, and I step closer, pulling her to my chest. I hold her tightly, breathing in the soft scent of her shampoo. “We never say goodbye.”
Her fingers tighten as she clings to me. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
Slowly, her gaze lifts to mine. “For loving me.”
“I’ll love you forever.”
“And I’ll always have you.”
I nod and release my hold. I have to be the one to do what’s right. One of us has to be strong even though I hate that it has to be me. “You should go. God only knows what Jacob is teaching Austin.”
Her smile looks pained, but she nods. Her lips part as though there’s something she wants to say, but I take a step back.
There’s nothing to make this easier and nothing we haven’t already said.
We love each other, want each other, need each other, and yet, we can’t have each other.
When we landed yesterday, we knew this was the end of the road, and now, I have to watch her make the turn.
Devney gets to the door, opens it, and looks back at me one more time. She lifts her hand to wave, covers her mouth, and disappears.
I don’t hear or notice my brother make his way to me. I just stand here, watching her taillights fade down the drive.
His hand rests on my shoulder. “I’m sorry, Sean.”
“It was never going to work.”
“Don’t say that.”
“It’s why I never fought for it before. It’s why I fucking lied and refused to let my feelings become more than friendship. Fuck! I knew this was a bad idea.” I shove his hand off me and go out to the porch. I sit there, hoping the car will reappear.
He sits beside me in the rocking chair, quiet and so damn loud at the same time. Each time he looks at me, I can feel his disappointment.
