Page 121 of The One for Me
We aren’t stressed about anything and can just enjoy our time.
When we get back, the issues will still be there, and we’ll still have to handle them, but for now, none of that matters.
“This is so cool! Mom would love to go on . . .” Austin trails off, the excitement in his voice fading.
Devney places her hands on his shoulders, and I move so we’re eye level. I remember that feeling. When you wanted to have your mother there, but she was gone. I would have that pause so many times that I would want to scream, cry, or punch someone. She should’ve been there when I got an A on a test. I wanted her smile when I hit a homerun. It was gone, though, and there was no getting it back.
“Your mom would love to go on what?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
I wait until Austin looks up at me. “It does. It always matters, and you can’t let her memory go. What’s going to get you through this is remembering her and what she said and what she did. It’s hard, and there will be days when remembering hurts so much you will just want to forget, but she loved you and would want you to think about her.”
Devney comes around and kisses the top of Austin’s head. “Don’t ever forget them, Austin. I won’t. Jasper would’ve loved to see all of this. He loved cars, building things, and his family. Imagine all the things he would say if he could see that castle.”
Austin’s eyes lift to it. “He would wonder if they used the right nails.”
We both laugh, and Devney takes his hand. “Yeah, and he would ask if they prebuilt any of it.”
“He was weird,” Austin says with his thoughts a million miles away.
“He was, but I loved him very much.”
Austin looks back at her. “Me too. I miss them, Aunt Devney.”
“I miss them too.”
He throws his arms around her and she presses a kiss to each of his cheeks.
“I love you with my whole heart,” she tells him.
“I love you too.” He looks up at me. “I love you too, Sean.”
My throat feels tight as emotion starts to choke me. He’s part of her. He’s her child, and to love her means to love him. I don’t know when it happened, but there’s not a doubt in my mind about how I feel about Austin. I want to be there and a part of not only her life but also his. There will be sacrifices, but I’ll make each one if it means I can be there.
I pull him in for a hug, wishing I could say everything that’s in my heart. Instead, I say the one thing that means everything to me. “I’ve got you, Austin.”
“What does that mean?”
I hear Devney hiccup and see the tears falling down her cheeks as she explains. “It means that no matter when, no matter what, he’ll always be here.”
“So, it’s like saying I love you?”
She nods and then palms my cheek. “It is.”
I take her hand in mine and then Austin’s in the other. “When we were kids, it wasn’t cool to say I love you to a girl, so I told her that I had her. I’d always have her. I’d make sure she was safe, and if she needed me, I would be there. It means I love you and you don’t have to worry.”
Austin smiles. “I’ve got you too then.”
“Yeah, kid, you sure do.”
Chapter Thirty-Six
Devney
Who knew that vacations were so damn exhausting?
I sure didn’t.
