Page 36 of Fight for Me
“How is work going?” Connor asks.
“It’s fine, I’ll have to go into the city next week. There are a few meetings I can’t miss, and I need to see a guy for Sydney.”
He throws his line out. “What about Syd?”
“I figure she’ll tell everyone, but she’s selling the farm.”
The pole dropping from his hands tells me that’s a no. “She’ll never sell her farm.”
“Well, she is.”
“What the fuck did you do, Declan?” His voice is low and my name comes through his teeth.
Of course, it must be my fucking fault. Everything is my fault if you ask them. I step back, instantly angry and frustrated that he jumped to that conclusion. “Couldn’t be her decision, right? It has to be something I did?”
Connor grabs his pole and throws his line back out. “I didn’t say that, but … this is Syd. This is her home. She wouldn’t leave here on a whim.”
“She said she wants to be closer to Sierra and her family.”
He shakes his head and then rubs his forehead. “This doesn’t make sense.”
“I said the same.”
“And now you’re helping her?”
“I’m not sure,” I admit. “I don’t know if this is what she really wants, but the offer was out of my mouth before I could stop it.”
He laughs. “Of course it was. You love her. You’ve always loved her, and you’re back in the town where it was all about you and Syd.”
“What does that mean?”
My youngest brother snorts and then stares at me like I’m an idiot. “It means that you can’t help yourself when it comes to Sydney. It means that you being around her makes you do dumb shit, like going to her pond and screwing her a couple of months ago.” He keeps going when I open my mouth. “Yeah, I know all about that.”
“She’s not mine anymore.”
“No, but neither of you seem to get that. I know you’re my older brother and you know everything, but you’re an idiot. That woman is the best thing you had in your life.”
“And you know damn well why I had to let her go.”
He looks over at Hadley, who is grinning as she twirls the rod. “I know, but while you may not want a wife and kids, you want Sydney.”
“Well, I think we both know that, in life, you don’t always get what you want.”
“No, but we can have something.” Connor casts his line out and then continues, “We aren’t destined to suffer forever. It’s a choice you’re making.”
Maybe he’s right. I made a lot of choices over the last few years that I wish I could go back and change, but maybe my being back here isn’t about changing things, but making it right.
“What do you think of telling Sydney about what happened with the accident?”
Connor blinks a few times and then shrugs. “You mean the whole story?”
“Yes, I think maybe … maybe it could make things better. Maybe she’d understand why I left, and we can be friends.”
“I don’t know, I mean, I’m sure Ellie wouldn’t care. Syd is her best friend, but I don’t think it would hurt. If you’re never going to give in to the obvious feelings you both have, might as well give her some closure.”
“I have never denied that I love her.”
He releases a heavy sigh. “No, but you won’t do anything about it either. You love her, but you won’t try again? You love her, but you won’t fight for her? You let her go, but you’re holding on.”
