Page 19 of All I Ask
“You need to stop being so dependent on him. It’s okay to be alone.”
“Says the serial boyfriend?”
Dating someone new has never been a big deal before. He usually lasts about two months with a girl before he realizes she’s not for him, they break up, things go back to normal, and I rest easy again. He’s never dated anyone longer than four months. Until now.
Derek leans back, watching me with curious intent. “Why are you upset anyway?”
Because I don’t want you to be serious with anyone.
Because it’s you I see in my future.
Because you should loveme.
“I’m not. I’m hurt. You should’ve told me. We talk all the time and have dinner once a month. You’ve forgotten to tell me about the new girl or you didn’t want to tell me?”
He crosses his arms and releases a heavy sigh. “I knew you’d act like this.”
“Like what?”
“This! Like I’ve done some horrible thing and betrayed you. I really like Meghan. I love her, Teagan. And as my best friend…” Hemay be saying it as though I’m important, but right now, I hear the words as much more. He’s reminding me of my place in his heart. I’m only the friend and I’d do well to remember it. “I would think you’d be happy for me.”
I close my eyes, shoving down my feelings for him and focus on how many times he’s been there for me. How many nights he held me when Keith said something mean or I’ve gone back and forth about leaving him.
Countless shirts I’ve soaked over stupid things with my family or friends and Derek has always been there. He has always been my rock, and I’m being selfish.
Slowly, I lift my gaze to his. “I am happy for you, if you’re happy. I was just taken by surprise, that’s all.”
“You’d really like her, Tea.”
I doubt that.
“If she likes you, she clearly has good taste,” I say with a smile.
Derek laughs. “Yeah, I’m such a catch. I don’t know how the hell I convinced her to date me. She’s beautiful, funny, smart…a lot like you.”
My chest constricts. “So, she’s amazing?” I try to joke it off.
“She could be the one.”
So could I, if I wasn’t so afraid to tell you and hope you felt the same.
Chapter Seven
Teagan
Present
“I’ll give you two a moment,” Mr. Beeson says as he walks out.
Derek turns his back, hiding the pain so clear in his eyes. “Derek.” I call his name, but he doesn’t move. “I’m so sorry.”
He shifts, his head shaking before lifting toward the ceiling. “Don’t say shit you don’t mean. We all know how you felt about Meghan.”
“That’s not fair.”
“No, none of it is fair,” he agrees, but not about the same thing.
I didn’t love Meghan or even like her, but I would never wish her dead.
