Page 36 of Come Back for Me
“Will you?”
I’ll fucking do anything for her.
I lift my arm, inviting her to come to me.
She moves very slowly, making small noises when it hurts, but I stay completely still. She tucks herself into my side, head resting on my shoulder, and then I wrap the blankets around the both of us.
Neither of us say anything, I don’t think words are necessary. Right now, I couldn’t speak if I had to.
She’s with me. In my arms and allowing me to give her comfort. The amount of trust she’s giving me isn’t unnoticed. The last six hours have been hell for her, and once again, she shows her bravery.
We rock together as the sun continues to come up, lighting the sky in warmth. Her tears soak my shirt, but I don’t remark on it. If she needs to soak through a hundred shirts, I’ll let her. If she wants me to hold her for days, I’ll stay just like this. She may have gotten away from me that night, and our lives may be complicated, but one thing is for sure, Ellie will never feel small or broken again. I will do everything to make sure that, from this day forward, she feels protected.
* * *
“You really don’t have to drive me,” she says for the tenth time as we head to the preliminary hearing for her husband. “You’ve done so much for us already. I could’ve walked.”
Right, like I was going to let her walk twelve miles to the courthouse. She needed a ride since she can’t drive because of the medication she’s taking, and I couldn’t seem to let her leave my sight for more than an hour. So, my driving her is as much for her as it is for me.
“You don’t have to keep saying it. If I didn’t want to be here with you, I wouldn’t be. I know you can’t understand this, Ellie, but I need to be here with you right now.”
“You do?”
“Yes. I am not making you go in that courthouse alone. If you want me to come in, I will. If you want me to stay out of it, I will. I’ll do whatever you need me to. Okay?”
“Okay.”
She and Hadley stayed at my house last night, mainly because I was able to convince her that she needed someone to help her move around because she can barely walk upright. The doctor verified that she has three broken ribs and there is extensive bruising. His handprint is on her arm, and there is a purple mark on her cheek from when he slapped her, but she didn’t need stitches. I don’t have any intention of leaving her side.
Not because I want to control her but because I want to protect her, which is where I’m struggling to keep myself in check. Ellie had no choices and no way to leave, and it made her feel helpless. My stepping in and protecting her by trying to tell her how to handle things isn’t something I can do.
I don’t want Ellie to have another man take from her. So, I’m choking down every response I would normally give that would leave zero room for negotiation and trying to get her to come to the decision I want. If she doesn’t, which is something that hasn’t happened yet, I’ll have to pivot.
Sheriff Mendoza explained that today would determine if they keep Kevin in jail until the trial or if he makes bail and is released on his own.
If he’s released, I don’t know how I’m going to respond, and I don’t know if Ellie has a plan for if that happens.
I park the car, and Ellie reaches for the handle, but she doesn’t move to open the door. “I can’t do this.”
“Yes you can.”
“No,” she says with a hitch in her breath. “I can’t. I can’t see him.”
I get out of the car, go around to the passenger side, and open her door before squatting so we’re eye to eye. “He can’t hurt you. He’ll have to get through me to even come close to you.”
Her hand lifts, and she touches my cheek for a brief moment. “You owe me nothing, Connor.”
I’m not sure what she means by that. “I’m not here because I feel indebted to you. Why would you think that?”
“I don’t know, but I also don’t know why you’re doing this.”
“Because I care.”
“You care?”
How does she not see? “I care about you and Hadley. You have no idea how many nights I dreamed of you, Ellie. I didn’t know your name or anything but your face and how you saved me that night. Your smile, your eyes, the way you gave me trust and hope when I had none is what kept me alive. Night after night, I would replay it in my head, dreaming of my angel who came down from heaven, making me want to keep fighting. So, I may not owe you, but I do care about you. I’m doing this because I can’t imagine doing anything else but being here for you. I’m doing this because you are fucking brave and strong and no one ever deserves what was done to you. You got Hadley and left. You knew that your daughter needed you to choose her, and you did. So, you have to do it again now. You have to fight and walk in there with your head held high. I’ll be right beside you.”
She releases a heavy breath, turmoil clear on her face. “You say these things to me.” Her voice catches, and she has to clear her throat. “I’m not brave, but I want to be. I have so many things I want to say to you, but my head is such a mess.”
