Page 14 of One Last Time
My chest tightens as I clutch my throat. I thought we were doing a good job hiding things. Scott and I would never say anything in front of the kids, and I worked hard to hide my pain. Seems I sucked at that,too.
“I love you, Finn.” I touch his cheek, but he’s alreadyout.
Now to cry myself to sleep another night in my lonelybed.
Erica calledme this morning to inform me that “the Arc has moored in Tampa.” I’m assuming that is her not-so-subtle way of saying Noah is here, but who the hell knows with thatgirl.
She’s absolutely certifiablycrazy.
Forreal.
She’s unglued. Erica believes the government is performing an experiment on humans, and we’re in some sort of Hunger Games reality series. I’m not sure what district she’s in, but I’m hoping we aren’t in the same one. We’ll alldie.
She also lives at home with her parents, who still pay her bills while she works to find her cause in life. What does that even mean? Her cause? Shouldn’t it bepurpose?
I wish I were making this shitup.
I text Heather, praying this stupid plan of mine willwork.
Me: Hey! Youbusy?
Heather: I’m working now, but I get off in an hour. What’sup?
She’s never going to buy this, but my bullshit ability is at zero with my life being in thecrapper.
Me: I was thinking we could all go out tonight . . . I could really use the distraction. I’m dropping the kids off at Scott’s in afew.
Heather: Oh! Of course! Eli’s friend from New York is in town, but you’re welcome to come over if you want! We can drink by the pool and have a slumber party. Especially after being aroundAsshole.
Me: Yeah, Asshole will definitely hamper my mood. I could use some Heathertime.
I hate myself. I’m the worst friendever.
Guilt gnaws at me for misleading my friend atall.
I pace the living room with my phone in my hand. I won’t be this person. Heather doesn’t deserve me being thisway.
Me: Okay, I lied. I mean, not totally, but my intentions weren’t the best. I have to put a blog post up on Monday or I’m going to get fired by my twit of a boss. She told me to write about Noah. Don’t hate me! You can tell me to go to hell now. Don’t worry, I hate myself enough for the both ofus.
My phone rings, and it goes clattering to the floor. Why does she always call instead of texting? I’m quick to pick it back up and hit the greenbutton.
“Hello?” I say withtrepidation.
“You’re such an idiot! A complete and total idiot! If you needed to meet Noah, I would’ve brought him gift-wrapped to you. Dork.” Heather laughs, and I hear her partner, Brody, in the background. “All you had to do wasask.”
She doesn’t get the hatred I have for doing this. “I don’t want to ask you! I’m supposed to be a journalist or whatever the hell they call this shit. It’s my job to get the dirt on Eli’s freakingfriends.”
Heather sighs. “Eli knows this, and he got you the job because he knows you’re a good person,Kris.”
I don’t feel like a good person. I feel like auser.
“I owe that man. You should give him sex as a thank you.” Ismile.
“Oh, I will. Lots and lots of hot, sweaty sex. The kind that people writeabout.”
Brody grumbles loud enough for me to hear it and then makes a gagging sound. “Good. But please don’t tell me about it. I’m going to be sex-less for a while. It’s already been more than eleven months. Last thing I want to hear about is your fantastic sex with a guy who was on the cover of Men’s Health last month. Could he have at least oneflaw?”
“Tell me about it. I keep waiting for him to grow love handles. When he does, I’m going to poke at themdaily.”
