Page 95 of One Last Time
“Do you let other friends touch you likethis?”
I roll my eyes since he knows the answer to that. “I’mserious.”
“I am, too. My feelings for you are much stronger than just a friend. I think you knowthat.”
I hoped. I really hoped, but I didn’t know for sure. “Even aftertoday?”
There’s no way to explain my embarrassment over the shit-show that unfolded this morning. I still can’t believe Noah witnessed all ofthat.
“Why do you think today changedanything?”
“Because you’re a famous actor who could get any girl you want with zero baggage. Instead, you pick me.” I shrug. “The drunk girl who falls in pools and has a crazy ex who is clearly an asshole. One of my kids spent an hour being a total shit, and the other one is obsessed with you. Let me know when I land on the part that screams to stickaround.”
Noah shifts, rolling us so that we’re facing each other on our sides. “Do you think I don’t have a past? Do you think you’re the only one with things that make them lessperfect?”
“I think I’m chock full ofit.”
He huffs. “You’re not the only one who worries about the things in your life, Kristin. I worry you’re going torun.”
My throat goes dry at that statement. What is in his past that he thinks I’d run from? Whatever it is, if he thinks it’s worse than my baggage I’m not sure I would agree with him. “I don’t know what makes you thinkthat.”
“My past isn’t perfect. My life hasn’t always been Noah Frazier the actor. I’ve worked very hard to keep my shithidden.”
“Keep whathidden?”
Noah’s eyes fill with dread, and my stomachdrops.
“I want to—” He stops speaking, sits up, and releases a heavysigh.
“You can talk to me.” I place my hand on hisarm.
His hand opens and closes as he battles whatever is raging inside him. “I want to,” Noah says. “I’m going to talk. There are things that we need to talkabout.”
He’s scaring me a little, but at the same time, I want to be his safe place. Plus, my feelings for him have grown to the point that I couldn’t go back if I tried. Relationships aren’t easy, I know that, but he’s worth whatever effort I need to putin.
“Okay.” I sit up, pulling the sheet with me. “Whatever you have to tellme. . .”
His eyes meet mine, and his back straightens. “You’re what I want. You are everything that Iwant.”
“I want you, too.” I smile tentatively. I’m happy I’m what he wants, but I know that’s a prelude to what he has tosay.
“I hope you still do after I tell you this.” Noah exhales and then begins. “I was born Joseph Noah Bowman. Most don’t know that because I legally changed my name to Noah Frazier, which is my mother’s maiden name. Growing up, everyone called me Noah because Joseph was my father’s name. I think it broke my mother’s heart to call me thatname.”
My heart aches for him as he tells me that. I know a lot about his childhood, and I can’t imagine what it was like for him. It is a little strange that I’m in love with a man and I don’t know his actual name, but it makes sense why he changedit.
“So, you’ve sort of always been Noah anyway?” Iask.
“Yes, but I didn’t . . .” He stops and grips the back of his neck. “It wasn’t untilafter. . .”
I touch his cheek, hoping to give him a little encouragement. I’ve never seen him like this. Noah has been the driving force throughout the time I’ve known him. He’s pushed his way into my life and never backed down. He’s always been so self-assured and confident, and to see him shaken and unsure of himself has me scrambling for a way to reassurehim.
“You don’t have to be afraid. I’m not going anywhere.” I tell him the words he’s said tome.
“My feelings for you are unlike anything I’ve felt before. I’ve never told anyone this, at least not anyone in a very, very long time.” He looks away. “I don’t talk about it because I’m not proud of it. I’ve gone to extensive lengths to keep it out of themedia.”
I don’t want him to tell me anything he’s not comfortable with, and right now we’re not Kristin the reporter and Noah the actor. He’s the man who shares mybed.
“Noah, I wouldnever. . .”
