Page 40 of We Own Tonight
“No,” I say, shaking my headquickly.
There are so many things that I can’t do with him. I can’t get caught up in some tabloid scandal. I can’t have my life get flipped upside down because of him. I can’t date some celebrity who is only going to break my heart. More than anything, I can’t seem to push himaway.
“Do you have to work?” heasks.
“No, I mean I can’t date you. I can’t even think about whatever this is. I can’t be hurt again, Eli. I wasn’t kidding when I said I’m amess.”
Hurt flashes across his face before he masks it with a grin. “Who said anything about dating? I promise that no one will see us together. We’ll talk about the mess you are and figure out how you’re going to deal with me in yourlife.”
“I’m not having sex with youagain.”
He laughs and kisses me. “Whatever you say. Wear sneakers and a bathingsuit.”
Before I can respond, Eli is halfway down the stairs. “Why are you fighting so hard to see me? I’m clearly pushing you away. What is making you keep coming back?” Iask.
He stops, rushes back up the stairs, and pulls me close. “Because you’re not like every other girl. You’re the first person I’ve met in what feels like forever who doesn’t seem to want something from me.” His hand pushes the hair back off my face. “You look at me like I’m just a guy, not a meal ticket. You’re gorgeous, stubborn, and there’s something more that I can’t explain. I’m not saying this will work, but I’m willing to take a chance and see what this is, areyou?”
Every word he said was exactly the right one. I’m not looking for anything from him. Maybe this won’t work, but I don’t know that I’m strong enough to sayno.
“No strings?” Iask.
“No strings. Just achance.”
I’m not a fly by the seat of my pants kind of girl—I’m a planner. I like my life to have order because there’s too much chaos everywhere else. I can’t make my sister’s disease fit into a box, but I can make my schedule solid. It’s my only way of being able to control my life when everything else is spiraling. There was no way to plan for my parents to die when I was twenty-one, but I can make sure that each Thursday I’m at the youth center to teach self-defense. Eli is a variable, though. He won’t fit into a box, so I won’t let him become a fixture in mylife.
I know without a doubt, he’ll be the extra card that sends my house tumblingdown.
Chapter Twelve
Heather
The clock readsfour in the morning, and I groan. There’s no way I’m going to get back to sleep if my mind won’t stop running through all the possibilities of what Eli has planned. I didn’t think to even ask him what time he’s coming to get me today. For all I know, it isn’t until late morning, which is going to leave me keyed up allday.
I decide to be ready for whatever will happen. I won’t be caught off guard again and look likeass.
No, today I’m going to look as hot as possible. So, I climb out of bed and start a pot ofcoffee.
Two hours later, I’m showered and wearing my deep purple bikini, white off-the-shoulder top, and black lace shorts. I wanted to look like I didn’t spend an hour trying to select my clothes. I’ve curled my blonde hair in loose curls, and I actually put makeup on. Nicole would beproud.
I grab my phone and dial her number. It’s only six, but I don’t care. She’s the one who convinced me that I needed to let loose, so she can deal with my neuroticass.
“Hello?” her voice is hoarse andsleepy.
“Wake up!” Iscream.
“What’s wrong?” she asks sounding more alert. “Are youokay?”
“I have a date with Eli! That’s what’swrong!”
She groans, and I hear some rustling in the background. “For real? You call me at the freaking ass crack of dawn forthis?”
“Well.” I huff. “It was your genius idea I sleep with him, and now he keeps showing up, kissing me, and forcing me on randomdates.”
Nicole snorts. “Yeah, forcing you. I can imagine how hard it is to say yes to one ofPeople’s Sexiest Men Alive. Thetorture.”
Maybe “force” is the wrong word, but this outing wasn’t my idea. I have no idea what we’re even doing, except I need a bathing suit, which probably means my eyeliner was a stupid idea. I’m so not equipped for this. I’m much better when I’m incontrol.
Like atwork.
