Page 76 of Say I'm Yours
“You can’t think that way, honey. You have to be strong for him because he’s going to look to you.” Grace’s blue eyes fill with emotion. “You’re the oldest, Trent. You have to hold this family together.”
She’s right, but I don’t know what to do. If I push him, am I doing it for selfish reasons? No. It’s not selfish for me to want my father to live. There are things he has left to do. Like seeing Wyatt’s child, watching me finally stop being a pussy and marry Grace, go hunting again and bag the deer, beating up on the three of us when we fight at our annual fish off, and so much more. He’s the glue in this family.
He may not be the vocal one, but he’s the backbone.
“I can’t let him die.” My head drops into my hands.
Grace’s arms wrap around me and she holds me together. I’m not an emotional person by nature. I think my job has forced me to always keep some barrier between me and my feelings. It isn’t as if I work in a big city riddled with violence, but I somehow think that makes it worse. Having to respond to a traffic accident or incident involving someone I know is far worse than one involving a nameless stranger. To do my job, I have to shut it all out. This, though, this is unlike anything I’ve ever felt.
He’s my father.
And I’m going to lose him.
Grace and I head back to the waiting room, and the doctor is there waiting. “Trent, good. I have the lab results.” He holds the papers in the air.
“Are any of us a match?” I question.
“Wyatt is the closest match, so we’d like to get him started first. Zach is the next best option.” The doctor extends his arm as Wyatt steps forward. “Go ahead with the nurse and she’ll get you ready.”
Zach goes back to his seat, and I move toward the doctor. “Doc? Was I not a match?” I ask.
“Your blood type isn’t a match, so unfortunately you won’t be able to donate.”
“I see.” I hate that I can’t contribute in any way. “So, Wyatt will donate and if need be Zach will also? Is that the next step?”
“Yes.” He nods. “Your mother is also a possibility, but she doesn’t carry the same antibodies as your brothers.”
“Well, I’m glad some of us can help.”
“Trent?” He pauses and then shakes his head. “Never mind. I’m going to check on your dad, and I’ll be back with some answers once we start the transfusion.”
“What did you want to say?”
“Nothing, son. I need to get back there.” He drops what’s supposed to be a reassuring pat on my shoulder and walks away.
I had hoped I could do something. The sitting around and waiting is driving me crazy. I want to help, go get a new doctor, find a treatment plan, donate blood, or anything at this point.
“You okay?” Grace asks as I watch the doctor walk down the hall.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m glad you’re here.” We sit so her head rests on my shoulder and I start to calm a little.
“There’s nowhere else I’d be.”
“I should go check on my father,” I say, trying to keep my shit together.
“Okay, honey.”
We walk through the doors, and Grace heads to the waiting room to check if anyone needs anything. Wyatt is still getting his blood drawn, Zach is still in the same fucking chair, and my mother is with Dad.
I’m not sure how it’ll go, but I know that time is of the essence, and I’m not wasting anymore.
I walk closer and hear my mother’s voice animated and frustrated.
Please don’t let this be bad news.
“No, you can’t tell him anything.”
“I didn’t say anything to him because I wanted to talk to you first, Macie, but he has a right to know what the tests came back as,” Dr. Halpern’s voice is agitated but remains quiet. “If he sees this, he’ll know.”
