Page 13 of Say I'm Yours
“I never knew you liked that. It’s gross. No one likes black licorice. It’s the Halloween candy Mr. Meyer gave out and we all threw away.”
I groan and grab the bag, popping my favorite candy in my mouth. “How have you known me since I was seven and not know my favorite candy?”
She shrugs. “I might have tried to block it out because . . . eww?”
“You’re ridiculous.”
“And you like nasty candy!”
“Not the point.” I trade the bag of candy for my glass of wine. “My point is that Trent knows these things. He isn’t all bad. There was a lot of good. I miss the good. He’s the only man I’ve ever seen by my side.”
She grabs her beer and shakes her head. “Look, I know there’s always one guy that makes us stupid. Hell, I think if Bobby ever came back to town, I’d marry him because I’m that dumb, but Trent has hurt you, Grace. A lot. He’s also failed you in ways that left you broken.”
The need to defend him is still strong. “And I’ve hurt him!”
She slowly places the bottle on the table. “How? By makin’ him be an adult?”
Emily is always on my side, and if I’m honest, I did things to hurt him. I would ignore him, push him, fight with him for no reason because he wouldn’t give in. More than that, I let him treat me the way he has.
“I’m just saying he wasn’t the only one doing the hurtin’. Plus, he does this stuff because I let him for so long.”
“Okay, sure, but tell me why it’s worth all the hurt? Why the hell do you let yourself go back? Because I’ve seen the tears. I know that you love him, and I know he loves you, even if his foolish pride won’t let himself say it. But why?Whydo you love him?”
This isn’t the first time Emily has tried to get me to see the writing on the wall. It isn’t the first time that I actually have. I’m not sure how to explain what it is about him. It’s deep inside me.
“Because when he allows himself to let me in, it’s beautiful. He has the greatest capacity for love. He does the most selfless gestures. Trent would run through a burning building to save someone.”
“I know that. All the Hennington boys are good deep down, but tell me why you think you keep holdin’ on,” she pushes.
I take a moment to let all the good things that I’ve shoved so deep, rise to the top. The things I try so hard to forget because they make it easier to overlook the bad. Over the course of almost twenty years, there have been some fantastic moments with him.
“When I was fourteen and didn’t have a date to the dance, remember when Johnnie stood me up?” Emily nods. “Trent didn’t hesitate to run upstairs and put on his suit. His mama didn’t have to urge him. He went because he saw I was cryin’. There was the time that my horse died, and he stayed in that stall with me for twelve hours as I cried. He never complained once, he held me in his arms as I fell asleep. The first time we made love, he made sure I was comfortable, safe, and took care of me.” I shift in my seat and rest my head back. “I know it sounds so dumb, but I remember how he held my eyes as we connected. We were just barely adults, but it felt like something else completely.”
“And recently?”
I close my eyes and try to hold back the tears. “When my sister died, do you know that Trent stayed with me for two weeks? He took time off, drove me out to Baileyton, helped with the arrangements, he was by my side every step. I didn’t have to worry, because he was there.”
“I remember.” Emily’s eyes grow sad. “I know he held you together.”
“He did more than that. He took care of everything. Not once did he complain when I was a mess. Not one single word was said that wasn’t to support me,” a tear falls. “I lost my world that day, and Trent made it a little easier. He held my hand, kissed my tears away, he gave me everything I needed, and I never had to ask. He knows me inside and out.”
It feels like a long time ago, but it wasn’t. Five years ago, my sister was taken from us. She could’ve had it all. She should’ve, but she married a man who I begged her to stay away from. William spoke with his fists, and he talked a lot. He broke the beautiful girl I played dolls with and turned her into a shell of a woman.
Scarlett was almost defiant when it came to him, though. She saw only what she wanted and ran off as fast as she could. We begged her to listen. Daddy hated William the minute he laid eyes on him. Said he could see the anger in his eyes and that, one day, it would boil over. Scarlett thought she could save him. In the end, he killed her.
“Do you know that Trent was the one who found William?” I ask.
“I do.” She grabs my hand and holds it tight. “I remember that even though he wasn’t the sheriff there, he got in touch with his friends and made sure they found him.”
“He promised me that he’d find a way to fix it if he could. He was so sure. I fell so deeply in love with him that week.”
“Scarlett chose Bill. She loved a man who was all wrong for her. Maybe—”
My blood pressure spikes as my eyes snap to hers. “Trent has never raised a hand to me!”
“I know! I never said that, honey. Calm down. I’m saying that while Trent has never physically hurt you, he hasn’t been gentle with your heart.”
I take a calming breath and slow my heart rate. I know what she’s trying to say, but comparing Trent to Bill isn’t even close to okay. He may have hurt me but never in that way. He would rather die than raise a hand to me.
