Page 83 of Say You Want Me
“And I’ve understood that. I know that you’re handling this the only way you know how, but you’re pushing me out the door. I thought maybe if I go back to Philly for a while, I can give you the space we both need.”
“Then what?” His voice shifts. “Then you just come back?”
I’m going to lose it. I’m done being understanding and patient. I’m tired of feeling like I’ve done something wrong and have to walk on eggshells. Maybe what we felt for each other really was because of the baby. If so, better to figure this out now. Will it hurt to leave him? Yup. But the Wyatt I fell in love with died alongside our baby.
“I don’t know, Wyatt. Do I have a reason to come back?”
He slams his hand on the wheel. “So we’re going to go around in riddles?”
“This right here,” I say, pointing between the two of us. “This was something special. I fell in love with you. I want to stay and be a family. I love you!”
His head shakes back and forth. “No. No you don’t.”
“Yes I do! I love you! All I want is for you to stop fighting me now. You told me that night you were falling in love with me. I wanted to say it so bad, but I didn’t know if I was crazy. Don’t tell me I don’t love you!”
It’s not right. We were doing so well. We were happy. We were going to have a life together and a family . . . now we’re so broken. He doesn’t believe me.
“I was falling in love with you.”
“And now you aren’t?” I don’t know why I asked. I really don’t. Deep inside me, I know what he’s going to say.
Wyatt’s brown eyes shimmer with unshed tears. “No.”
Just like that, the fragile pieces of my heart disintegrate into dust.
“You know?” I let my tears fall freely. “It took me thirty-six years to ever let myself love a man. I thought when I finally let myself go, it would be for someone special. Even though you just single-handedly destroyed me, I wouldn’t change it.” I now understand Presley’s words. “I would give myself to you all over again, even knowing it would end this way.”
I open the car door and head inside. I don’t look back because there’s no point. He’s already gone.
“Wyatt?” I call out in the blackness. It’s three in the morning, and he’s not here. I look all around the house, but there’s no sign he ever came home. After our fight, he took off. I didn’t try to call him. I hadn’t wanted to. He really hurt me this time, but it’s strange that he’s not here.
I look for his truck, but it’s missing.
I call his phone, but get his voice mail.
Where the hell is he?
I don’t want to worry anyone, but I can’t seem to shake this feeling in my gut. Something’s wrong.
“Hey, is everything okay?” Trent’s sleep-filled voice comes through.
“I’m sorry to wake you, but Wyatt and I had a fight, and he left hours ago. I don’t know if he’s maybe with you?” I start to pace the floor. “I’m just worried.”
Trent clears his throat. “He’s not here, at least not that I know of. Let me check.”
I stay on the phone, and he lets me know Wyatt’s not there. “Can I borrow your car? I need to find him.” I hate asking, but there’s no way I’ll go back to sleep without knowing if he’s okay.
“I’ll look for him. You stay put in case he shows back up.”
“He’s not handling this well,” I inform him.
Trent releases a heavy sigh. “I know, Ang. I tried talkin’ to him the other day, but he told me to fuck off. I’ve never seen him like this, Zach and I are at a loss on what to do. But I know him, and he’ll figure himself out. He feels responsible for hurtin’ you.”
“It wasn’t his fault!”
“I know that. You know that. It’s Wyatt who doesn’t.”
My heart hurts for him. He has been awful, but I still can’t help but only see the man who made me coffee, baked cupcakes, showed me how to fish, and took me to the cabin. He was the man who would make me feel like I was worth everything. In a few short months, he showed me how great life could be with someone.
