Page 29 of Say You Want Me
The pit in my stomach grows. “Because!” I sit up, anger and confusion flowing through me. Why is he pushing me so hard?
Wyatt doesn’t stop. “What was your goal? Why would you change your entire world and come here? Just like you have fears, I got them too. I’m trying to get you to see that I’m not playin’ around. I’m giving you all I got, and you’re holding back.”
“I’m scared.”
“I am too, baby. I’m livin’ with knowing you’re packed up and gone with my kid in a few months. I’m going to make you see that what you’re willing to give up is more than what you got back home. I’m doing my damn best to ensure you see who I am. I don’t know if we’d be doing this if you weren’t pregnant. Hell, I know we wouldn’t.” He lets out a laugh devoid of all humor. “We’re both stubborn assholes, and we’d let that game play on for years. We don’t have years. We’re running on borrowed time.”
“Exactly! Without the baby, there would be no us! This is my whole damn point.”
It’s what keeps me holding back. Neither of us would move for the other. Not for the kind of feelings we had. Wyatt and I were dynamite in bed, but outside of that, we didn’t talk much.
“You still haven’t answered me. If you weren’t going to give this a real shot, why try?”
I don’t have an answer to give him, so I give him what I can and hope he understands the meaning behind the words. “You have no idea what it’s like to grow up thinking you’re worthless. It kept me from letting anyone in. It’s been easier to not get disappointed. I’ve kept my heart safe. So, when I push you, it’s because I’m scared. If I let you in fully, you won’t let me go!”
Wyatt lies back down, rolling onto his side, and I mimic the movement so I’m facing him. “You have every intention of going back, don’t you?”
“I did.”
“And now?”
Now, I’m losing more of my hold. I’m slipping each day.
“I don’t know. I don’t know anything other than we’re having this kid. We’re going to be parents, and I don’t know how I feel about us.”
He smiles. “Okay, I can handle that. I’m going to work harder.”
“I’m sure you will.”
Each excuse that I had as to why this wouldn’t work is fading away.
And here I am, falling for him. Fast. I don’t trust myself. I’ve never been in love, and he’s only ever loved Presley. What if this isn’t real?
ANOTHER DAY OF SOAP OPERASand surfing Facebook. I’ve been going slightly stir crazy the last week. Wyatt has to be ready to kill me. I’m at the farm every day, trying to fit in a little. Presley has been great, and I’ve been doing half her work since I’m bored. I’ve learned a lot about cattle, not that it’ll help me when I go back to Pennsylvania, but whatever.
Today has been harder for me. I’m depressed and really homesick. I miss the bakery, my friends (not that I have that many), and the city. I would love to take a walk through Old City, stop at a few stores, and then maybe see if anyone wanted to go to a Phillies game. Instead, I’m sitting here folding laundry and waiting for life to become fun again. Wyatt is normally home by now, but he said he had to stay late and help Cooper. Since Presley’s brother is the owner of the Townsend ranch, Wyatt doesn’t really get a say.
My phone flashes with a number I don’t know. “Hello?” I answer.
“Angie?”
“Yes,” I hesitate.
“Oh, thank goodness,” the voice rings of relief. “This is Mrs. Kannan, sugar.”
“Oh, hi,” I say with surprise. “Is everything okay?”
A few seconds of a pause. “Not really.” She coughs. “You see—” She breaks into another coughing fit. “I’m terribly sick and I have to get those cupcakes for the festival tomorrow.” She starts hacking and wheezing. She clears her throat and comes back on the line. “I can’t work and those cupcakes won’t make themselves.”
I see where this is going.
“I’m not the greatest baker. Presley would really be the better option,” I suggest.
Presley spent her time in the bakery part and was the real talent behind the curtain. I did a little, but I mostly worked in front and did bookkeeping stuff.
“I asked her, but she’s already baking pies with her mama. I’m desperate.” She manages the last word before hacking up a lung.
If I say no, I’d be a total bitch. “Okay, of course,” I say quickly. “Yes. I’ll help out however I can.”
