Page 44 of Cross Checks

That night, as I lay wrapped up in Hank’s arms, it was difficult to fall asleep. Excitement clashed with anxiety in my gut.

I pictured us walking hand-in-hand along a Florida beach. The wind tousled my hair, and I could feel the warm sand between my toes. Taking a deep breath, I inhaled the salty scent of the ocean. It should have been an idyllic scene, but I still felt uneasy.

“Chase,” Hank whispered. “You’re still awake, aren’t you?”

“Yeah, I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I didn’t mean to wake you up.”

He rolled over to face me. “Don’t worry. This was a huge day. I understand.”

We were silent for a moment. “Talk to me,” Hank suggested. “Tell me what’s going on inside your head.”

I hesitated because I wasn’t sure I could put the jumble of thoughts into words. “I’m just…scared, I guess. When I moved here from upper New York State, I didn’t expect to find everything that I have in my life now. I thought I’d play hockey, and then later, after retirement, I’d live the rest of my life. Does that make any sense?”

“I think so,” Hank answered.

“Now that I have a real life, and hockey is only a part of it, I don’t want to lose anything I have.” My pulse started to race. “I mean, what if we can’t handle this huge move? What if we don’t work? What if we lose each other along the way?”

Hank reached out and raked his fingers through my hair. “Hey, listen to me.” His voice was firm. “We’re a couple, okay? That’s not going to change. We’re heading to Florida, and we’re gonna be great there.”

Just before dawn, I woke. It didn’t take long for the excitement and worry to come flooding back. I carefully slipped out from under Hank’s arm. He moved slightly but was still sound asleep, with a faint smile on his lips.

I pulled on my winter coat and stepped outside into the frosty air. I shivered while I watched the first pink and orange of the sunrise appear on the horizon. Something clicked in me.

I’d been wallowing far too much in worries. It was time to buck up and trust the people around me. Coach Hoss and Hank were in agreement. It was my time to shine as a hockey player.

It was time to feel gratitude for all those who supported me instead of letting anxiety pull me under. The shot to play in the NHL was the one so few hockey players got. Jensen told me several times that he assumed his chance was gone. He thought he was too old, at age 30, and he simply wanted to enjoy playing for the Cougars as long as he could.

“Chase.” I jumped when I heard Hank’s voice behind me. It was still husky from sleep. He wrapped an arm around my waist and pushed up against my back. “It’s freezing out here. What are you doing?”

“Watching the sunrise and…thinking.”

“About Florida?”

“That and other things.” I leaned my head back against his shoulder.

“I know it’s a big thing, but enjoy the excitement. That’s important. I love you, which means I want to be with you and share everything you achieve. That’s not going to change.”

We stepped back inside, and Hank said, “Let’s get some coffee and breakfast going. You’ve got a big day ahead of you.”

“I’ve got a question.”

“Yeah?” Hank was already pulling eggs from the fridge and reaching for the pancake flour.

“Is there any chance you could take the day off?”

Hank raised an eyebrow. “I suppose I could with a clear reason. Is something going to come up?”

I grinned. “I’m going to call the Panthers tomorrow, and I’ll accept their offer as long as it’s reasonable. Today, I want to spend the day with you and soak in everything about Cold Pines that makes it special.”

Hank smiled. “That can probably be arranged. I’ll need to stop at the station for a bit this morning and talk to the chief, but I bet I can get the entire afternoon off. Can we start our tour of the town over lunch?”

“That would work great. We’ve got a morning practice, so I’ll hang with the guys and practice my slapshots.”

As I entered the locker room at the Cold Pines Arena, the familiar sounds of laughter and clinking of hockey gear grounded me. Jensen was busy sharing a wild story, animatedly gesturing with his hockey stick while Waller and a few others listened, chuckling and shaking their heads.

“Hey, Taylor,” Jensen called out as soon as he spotted me. “You missed the part where I saved a kitten from a tree. I shinnied up there like an expert.”

I rolled my eyes, and a smile tugged at my lips. “Right, and I suppose next you’ll tell us that you crawled out on this narrow, flimsy branch…”

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