Page 59 of Knot Our Reality

Evander nods. “They also have Sundays blocked off for her to spend with them, so we’ll be on our own tomorrow. I highly doubt she has any intention of introducing us to them this early.”

For the next little while, we listen to Alexei, Nikolai, Ian, and Lee tell us about meeting her last season and how amazing her boys are. I think it’s smart for her to wait to introduce us. I can’t imagine what it’s like for those boys. They lost their fathers when they wereso young, and now, their mom is pregnant with no dad in sight. I wonder how much she told them about what happened—how she explained it.

At seven and five, they might not know exactly how it all works, but they have to know enough to know she didn’t get pregnant on her own.

Then they’re here while she’s searching for a pack. That has to be a lot for them.

When Bree arrives, she brings the cameramen with her. We rearrange the furniture until she’s satisfied and then sit down for the interviews. The questions are the same as they were after my first date with Evangeline.

What do we think of Emilia? How did our first date go? That kind of thing.

Then it changes to what it’s like to be back and seeing other suitors from past seasons.

Once we’re done, Bree tells us to head downstairs. The kitchen staff has a buffet set up for us, which is nice of them.

I feel like I should be nervous since today is the first rose ceremony, but I don’t foresee any of us being sent home besides Daniel, who’s already gone. Maybe in the coming weeks, I’ll be more worried.

Sure, Emilia could surprise us and send some of us packing, but I don’t think that’ll be the case.

Or at least that’s what I’m hoping.

For now, I’m just going to focus on getting to know the other suitors and filling up my belly.

Chapter Fifteen

Emilia

Trudging down to the basement, I’m trying to gear myself up for my session with Finn. We had one session when I arrived at the compound, but this is only the second time I’m meeting with him.

I know having him here made a world of difference for Remington, and I have nothing against therapy or counseling. I went for a few months after I lost my pack—once I was able to drag myself out of bed—but it didn’t help at all. That’s when I decided to just bury it all so I could be there for my boys.

That it’s required, at least for now, is what has me rebelling against it. I hate being told I have to do something.

But that’s just me being a brat. I assured Remington I would give Finn a chance.

He’s a super nice guy, and I have no problem listening to him talk. The problem is, he wants me to talk about my pack and losing them. He wants me to bring up emotions I’ve long buried, and I know that’s going to hurt.

I also know I need to do it. Being here now and having met all sixteen of my suitors, I know there’s no chance in hell of keeping this just friends who are a pack of the same pack. That means I need to figure out how to deal with losing my first pack and allowing myself to move on.

It won’t be easy, and it’s going to be miserable, but I need to do this. For myself, for my boys, and for the suitors who want to be a part of my pack.

I knock on the door, and it opens moments later to reveal a grinning Finn.

Finnegan Abernathy was one of Bree’s suitors onHeated’spremiere season. I remember him from the first season because Remington was so sad to see him leave. His mom was dying, and he had to leave to say goodbye to her. While back in Scotland, he met his pack—apparently Americans.

From the way Bree tells it, as soon as she found out he was no longer single, she reached out so she could hire him, so there would be a psychologist on hand while the show is filming.

“Good evening, Emilia.” Finn steps back, waving for me to come in. He closes the door behind me and takes a step toward the sitting area before pausing. “Still more comfortable sitting on the couch?”

“I am. Thank you.” I hurry over to said couch, pulling the fuzzy blanket over my shoulders, then grabbing the matching pillow to rest in my lap. My hands run over the pillow, enjoying the soft material. It’s not something I’d want in my nest because it would be destroyed in a heat, but I love them for everyday cuddling.

Finn settles into the armchair across from the couch before speaking up again. “So, how did it go? Meeting your suitors and the dates, I mean.”

I glance down at my lap, picking at the pillow, and refusing to meet his eyes. “Most of it was good, I guess.”

“I already know about Daniel. We can talk about that if you want, but I’d say it’s a good thing he’s gone.”

“Oh, yeah. No, I don’t need to talk about that. I’m fine with it.” I wrinkle my nose. “Some people are just assholes. I should be lucky there was only one of them out of the sixteen suitors.”

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