Page 12 of Knot Our Reality

“Of course you did. I bet he was on you like…how does that saying go? On you like white on rice?”

I throw my head back as laughter spills from me—something that seems to please Sasha.

“Yes, he was.” I agree, and my eyes catch Reginald. I’m not surprised to realize our time is over. “I’m a little mad that you convinced me to talk about Ryan, since it means I didn’t learn about you, but I’m also grateful. I don’t think I’ve allowed myself to think of the good times because it was overshadowed by their deaths.”

Sasha hums. “You were grieving. No one can blame you for this. It will get easier each time you speak of them.”

“It sounds like you know from experience.”

He shrugs but says nothing, and I’m not going to press him on it. We’re all allowed to keep things to ourselves.

It’s what I expected I’d be doing with my suitors, but I’ve been proven wrong multiple times already today.

“That’s the end of our time,” I tell him sadly, realizing I never asked him about my kids. “We should join the others so we can get dinner, but before that, I have a question for you.”

“Okay.”

I can practically feel Reginald glaring at me. “I’ve asked the first three suitors, and I plan to ask each and every one of you. I know you’re aware of what’s brought me here today, but you agreed to come onto the show knowing I was pregnant and already had two kids. Why?”

It might not be the exact question I asked each of them, but even in their differences, they’re all asking the same thing in the end.

“You worry about how your children will be treated.” Sasha doesn’t pose it as a question. “As you should. Do you know what I wish for themost? A family of my own—children, brothers, lovers, sisters. I care not. I want a family, so I will never be alone. A family I can love. A family I grow old with. If I am your alpha, I am parent to your children because they are mine. Does not matter they were not born of me.”

I lick my lips, a sensation starting in my lower belly I haven’t felt in a long time. One I didn’t expect to feel ever again, and that I’m not sure I can allow myself to feel again.

Attraction—a soul-deep desire not to just bed this man but to have him in my life.

Sasha is the exact opposite of who I planned to be in my new pack.

He’s trouble, and I should stay away.

But when he takes my hand in his and leads me toward my other day one suitors, I allow him to.

No, more than that—I cling to him.

I’m so fucked.

“Are you alright, Emilia?” Lee asks as we approach, worry on his face as he watches me.

I nod, forcing a smile because what else can I do?

My emotions are turbulent inside me, and I don’t know how to even begin working through them. So, as always, I’ll fake it until I make it.

“This entire experience is going to be emotional,” I admit. “More than I thought, but I’m okay. Although I’m starving, so I think we should go eat.”

Bree claps her hands. “You heard the omega. It’s dinnertime!”

She and Tessa head up the pathway, but my suitors don’t immediately follow them. Instead, each of them watches me as if they don’t understand me, and I’m sure they don’t.

Hell, I don’t understand myself or what’s going on with me. I can’t expect them to if I can’t.

Bradley is the first to follow them, inclining his head toward me before leaving. Malik looks like he wants to say something, but ends up snapping his mouth shut before trailing behind Bradley.

I can tell Lee doesn’t believe my words, but instead of pushing me, he offers me his arm, and I take it with my free one. Sasha is still holding my other hand and seems to be in no hurry to release it.

I shouldn’t be holding his hand at all, and I definitely shouldn’t be letting it go on this long, but I can’t help myself.

Feeling more comfortable than I should, I allow both alphas to lead me up the walkway and into the house.

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