Page 21 of Devon
“It’s good that she found someone.”It wasn’t Ryan’s job to watch over Haley, but she’d need people after Devon left.Devon felt good about the fact that one of those people might be Ryan.
Feeling good about that also made him feel guilty, though.He shouldn’t be leaving Haley.She washissister, not Ryan’s, and she needed him.It was nice that she also had Ryan, apparently, but it wasn’t the same.Ryan wasn’t Devon.
There was no way out of it, though.If Devon left the village, he’d have to leave Haley, too.He would never be able to convince Melissa to take her daughter and leave the only place where they’d felt safe in years.She shouldn’t have to do it, anyway.Leaving was Devon’s decision, just like he’d decided to bother Kendrick and fixate on him.Melissa and Haley had nothing to do with that, and they shouldn’t pay for how stupid Devon had been.
Devon turned to his sister.She was sitting in the grass and playing with her dolls, and almost as if she could feel him watching her, she glanced up and beamed at him.He peaked at Ryan, but the man didn’t seem to think anything of Hailey’s fangs.He looked relaxed and peaceful, and for some reason, it helped Devon feel the same.
When he thought about Kendrick and Jonas, he still felt the need to hide, but he didn’t want to leave as badly as he had before.
It was a dangerous way to think.He couldn’t stay.After what he’d done, Kendrick and Jonas didn’t deserve to be stuck with him, especially as a family member.Even if he decided to stay, he and Ryan shouldn’t be together.It was even ridiculous to think that something like that could work.
But for the first time, Devon wished it could.He felt the pull toward Ryan, and he wanted to give in.He wanted to lean closer to his mate, to have Ryan wrap an arm around his shoulders and hold him close.He wanted to feel safe and cherished, and he knew that Ryan could give him all of that.Unfortunately for him, even though Ryan seemed willing, Devon couldn’t accept it.He’d made a mess out of the chance he’d had of living there, and the only way to clean it up was to leave.
Devon hated this.He didn’t want to leave.He wanted to stay in the only place that felt like home.He wanted to watch Haley grow up.He wanted to be there when Melissa needed him.
He would keep in touch with them over the phone and visit as often as he could without making a mess of things, but it wouldn’t be the same.Haley would grow up, and she wouldn’t need Devon as much as she did now.Ryan would eventually give up and find someone else to love, and Devon would grow old.Ryan, Melissa, and Haley wouldn’t, or at least, not as quickly as he would.He was human, but they weren’t.
Ryan was Devon’s chance to age as slowly as Melissa and Haley would, but he couldn’t take it.It wouldn’t be fair.It hurt to think, but Devon couldn’t deny that it was the truth.He’d ruined his own life.It was better for him to leave so that Melissa, Haley, and Ryan wouldn’t pay the consequences of Devon’s stupidity.
“It’s good that she has you,” Ryan said.“We didn’t talk a lot, but I could tell that she loves you very much.”He hesitated.“Kendrick told me a bit about your story, so I know that you and Haley aren’t related.You decided to be her brother, and that’s not something many people would’ve done.She’s right to love you as much as she does.”
“We’re not really family.”Devon couldn’t help but wonder how much Kendrick had told Ryan.He couldn’t have told himeverything, right?Ryan wouldn’t be here if he knew.
“Because you don’t share blood?Trust me, blood doesn’t make family.”
“You’re Kendrick’s brother.”
“Half-brother.We might share blood, but we don’t have the same mother.He’s not who I was talking about, though.My parents decided they didn’t want me anymore and didn’t hesitate to kick me out.You would never do anything like that, even though you’re not related to Haley.”
He was right, but Devon wasn’t sure how helpful the conversation was.
* * * *
RYAN WISHED HE KNEWwhat was going through Devon’s mind.For some reason, Devon didn’t seem to recognize that the way he loved Haley was good and something that not many people could feel.
Haley wasn’t Devon’s sister.They weren’t even the same species, but it was obvious the two of them loved each other.Ryan’s parents didn’t love him as much as Devon loved Haley, and Ryan was actually related to them.
As far as he was concerned, blood didn’t mean anything.Kendrick loved him, but not because they had the same father.He loved him because they were brothers, and that went beyond the blood they shared.
Maybe it was a Kudlak thing.Devon was human, but he’d been living with Melissa and Haley for a while, from what Ryan knew.That might be why he felt that he should be blood-related to them, or maybe he just loved them so much that he wished he was.
Ryan wanted to say more, but he didn’t want to spook Devon.He was surprised that they were still talking.He’d expected Devon to whisk his sister inside and slam the door closed so that Ryan couldn’t follow or something like that.Instead, they were standing in front of Devon’s house, watching Haley as she played with her dolls.Her voice was sweet and gentle, and it soothed something in Ryan.
Even after everything she’d been through, Haley was happy.Of course, she was only six and didn’t understand the world, but still.Maybe Ryan could try to be a little more like her.He needed to stop being doom and gloom all the time.So what if he didn’t have a job or didn’t know what he wanted to do with his life?He had a home and his brother.Everything else would eventually happen.
He’d find a job.Maybe he would like it so much that he decided to do that long-term, or maybe it would be temporary until he found something else.It didn’t really matter.Whatdidmatter was that he had people who loved him.
He glanced at Devon.Maybe one of those people would eventually be his mate.They hadn’t yet talked about their bond and what it meant, and Ryan was afraid of spooking Devon.He’d been wary when he’d arrived, and while Ryan had thought it was because he’d found a stranger playing with a sister, he suspected that wasn’t the case.Devon had been wary of Ryan from the moment they’d met.
Ryan wanted to show him there was no reason for him to feel that way, but he wasn’t sure how to do that because he didn’t know why Devon felt the way he did.It was why he hadn’t pushed when he’d changed Devon’s tire the other day.It was why he didn’t ask questions now, even though he was dying to.
He cleared his throat and took a step back.“I should go.You’re home, so I don’t have to worry that something will happen to Haley.”
Devon turned to Ryan.He bit his lower lip, and Ryan told himself not to be an idiot.Devon didn’t need him to drool over him.
“Do you really have to go?”Devon asked.
Ryan’s heart beat faster.Why was Devon asking?What did he mean?“Not really.I don’t have a job yet, but I was getting bored in the house, especially because my brother and Jonas are out.”
