Page 37 of Get Lost

Kelsey typedbutthole bleachinginto the blank area, then sent Alexander the payment, and looked across the table. “Thanks, BrynnieBoo.” She looked pointedly at the others. “All right. That’s done. Pay up, suckas.”

Her phone beeped with a payment alert and Kelsey smiled because of how quickly her girlfriends chipped in their share. “Nice, which one of you has the quickdraw thumbs?”

All three of her friends raised their hands to show that they weren’t holding their phones and couldn’t have sent payment yet.

Kelsey frowned as she realized what had just transpired. “Oh, you’vegotto be kidding me. This mother effer.” She opened the Venmo app and, sure enough, Alex had just sent a payment to her, refunding the amount andaddingone additional dollar.

In the section where she’d writtenbutthole bleaching, he wrote:

Buttholes are cool, butCheetos are neato

Kelsey placed her phone face down on the table angrily. “I hate that man.”

Nessa giggled.

“Shut up, Nessa.”

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