“You are,” she says over me. “You seem more sure of yourself.You’ve grown up, Teddy. Before, you were a boy. Now look at you—a husband, a daddy, a doctor. You’re a man now.”
I let her words sink in as I watch Henrik down on the ice.
She nudges me. “What are you thinking?”
“I’ve always felt like I was sort of blasting through life, you know? Taking risks, making mistakes.”
She laughs. “We all make mistakes. It’s called living.”
I shake my head, still lost in thought. “No, I was … I think I was afraid to really live, you know? At least, I was afraid to live as me. I teased Henrik for compartmentalizing, but I did it too.”
“How so?”
“I kept putting pieces of myself in boxes. Too loud? Put it in a box. Too emotional? In another box. I tried to be whatever people around me needed me to be. I did it so much, I think I forgot who I really was.”
Her expression softens a little. “And now you’ve remembered?”
I smile. “Henrik helped me remember. And Karro. There’s no such thing as too much Teddy for them. With Karro, I can be as loud and as silly as I want. I can bedazzle T-shirts and sing until I’m hoarse.”
She loops her arm in with mine. “And Henrik?”
I watch him skate past, warmth glowing in my chest.
With one look at my face, she’s pulling away with a huff. “God, forget I asked.”
I laugh, keeping her pinned at my side. “Don’t get me wrong, the sex is fucking epic. I mean, just the other day we were in the massage room at work and—”
“Nope. No way.” She waves her hand in front of her face. “To me, you’re still seven years old, wearing Superman pajamas, asking me how to make mac and cheese.”
“It’s not just about that,” I say, still laughing. “In fact, it’s not really about the physical stuff at all.”
She glances up at me. “What do you mean?”
“I mean that with Henrik, for the first time in my life, I tried to build the relationship first, no sex. I think depriving me of sex was the key needed to unlock me. Does that make any sense?”
“Unlock you?”
“Yeah, like, unlock my personality. I was so afraid Henrik didn’t want me sexually that it started to not even matter if he liked my personality. So, I just let it all out. He got the full Teddy treatment, with no filter.”
“And he stayed?” she teases.
I shrug my shoulder in my bedazzled WAG jacket, recalling the sweet words he whispered to me in the massage room. “I think he might like me just as I am. Go figure, right?”
She hums, clapping along with the music as the lights in the stadium lower.
“What?” I say, raising my voice to be heard.
She just smiles, shaking her head. “Oh, Teddy.”
“What?” I say again.
“I think he might love you.”
“Ithought you said we could get ice cream,” Camila whines.
“We have to wait for your uncle Henrik,” Jayla replies.
“But it’s right there!” She stomps her foot, pointing to one of the concession stands, which has pictures of ice cream posted on the wall.