Page 59 of The Healing Touch

“Then why do you think I’d abuse you? You know me better than that, Becca.”

The censure in his voice cut straight through her soul. What else was she supposed to think, though? He liked to dominate women.

“First, I don’t do the BDSM scene. Whips, chains, leather? All that is nonsense. Some people like to use them, to roleplay, but I don’t. I have no need to collar you, dress you in things you clearly won’t be comfortable in, or ever lay a hand on you intending physical harm. That’s not me. It’s true, I like a little pain…”

“See!” Becca reared back. “Pain, Dimitri. I don’t do pain the way you don’t do relationships.”

He stared at her, shocked she’d think he’d hurt her. He knew where she was getting all these preconceived notions. The market was flooded with books about BDSM relationships, relationships that would never be considered healthy anywhere except the pages of a work of fiction. He agreed with Nikoli there. Their brand of dominance did not involve ever harming a woman.

“Let me finish before you jump to those conclusions of yours, will you?”

Her glare was hot enough to fry an egg on the Arizona pavement, but she nodded.

“Good girl. Now, I like a little pain, meaning me as the receiver. It’s why when you sank you nails into me this morning, I nearly fucked you then. It sends my own lust out of control. Do I like to be hurt? Fuck, no. Someone ever tries to come near me with a whip or cane, they won’t walk away from it. I don’t do BDSM. But nails? Does me in every time.”

“But you said you were dominant.” Accusation rolled off her tongue, and he leaned forward to kiss her lips lightly. They were adorable all puckered up in a pout. He couldn’t help himself.

“I am, but not the way you’re thinking about it. I do like control. I do like to have you bound, unmoving while I fuck you. Does that mean you won’t get the same satisfaction I do? I think you can answer that for yourself.”

The blush that sprang up was instantaneous. He loved the soft bloom of color. It was just something else about her he loved.

“Dimitri, I am not a submissive person. I…I won’t ever let someone control me.”

He sighed. She wasn’t seeing this the right way. “I don’t want to control you, Becca. I love you the way you are. I love your sass and that smart mouth. I love the way you fight back, the way you stand up to me and tell me what for. I would never change that.”

“But…”

“But nothing. Stop interrupting me and listen.” He waited for her nod before he continued. “I don’t want to controlyou, Becca, just situations.”

“Situations?”

He rolled his eyes. What about “stop interrupting me” did she not understand?

“You said you liked me challenging you, so don’t roll your eyes at me. I’m trying to understand.”

“You got me there.” He pulled her head down so it was resting against his chest and started to stroke her hair. “Situations. Simple things, really, like where to go to eat, what movie to watch, how I fuck you in the comfort of our own bedroom. See, nothing really too outrageous.”

“Dimitri, I may not want to eat where you want to eat or see the movie you want to see. We don’t see eye to eye on movies. I’d go watchThe Notebookwhile you’d see a rerun of whatever action movie is playing.”

He chuckled. She knew him all too well. He hated chick flicks even though that was what he wrote. “That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t compromise on those things. I’m not an evil bastard who’s going to tell you what to do, how to do it, and where to do it in all things. You are a brilliant woman. I wouldn’t take that from you. Let me ask you something, though. When was the last time you were able to not worry about something? About having to solve something all by yourself. Wouldn’t you like someone to help you? Even make some of those hard decisions? Wouldn’t you like it, for once, to rely on someone else?”

“Not if it meant giving up my own free will.”

Her reply was quick and to the heart of it. He didn’t want her to give that up. That wasn’t what he was trying to do…or was it? He thought about all his past relationships with women, at least the ones he’d had this kind of relationship with. Hadn’t he asked them to do that? To give up everything and do as he told them? Was that why he’d gotten so bored so fast?

The more he thought about it, the more he realized that wasn’t the type of relationship he wanted with Becca. He wanted her to be herself, not someone there to do with as he pleased.

“Here is what I want from you, Becca. I want you to be yourself, no worries about what I might do or say or think. Just be the same person you’ve always been around me. The only place I really want dominance is in the bedroom. I want to tie to you up and fuck you. I want to bind you so you can’t move while I make you come over and over. I want control there.”

“But what if I want to tie you up?”

Her question surprised him so much, he couldn’t even form a response. Tiehimup?

She sat up and twisted so she could face him, and he saw the devilment in her eyes. She was enjoying his discomfort. “What? You never thought about anyone doing those things to you?”

“Well, no.”

“Let me get this straight. You want me to let you do these things to me, but you’re not willing to follow that old adage, ‘what’s good for the goose is good for the gander’?”