Page 16 of I Need You to Read This
“Yeah, trying to catch up,” she says, suddenly too aware of her face and the way her mouth is moving. “I mean, this is actually my first week, so trying to get started actually.”
“Oh yeah? Congratulations on the new gig.” He looks at her for a beat longer than she is used to. She feels her ears getting hot.
“You’re at theHeraldtoo?” Alex asks, knowing from his clothes that he isn’t. No journalist wears an actual suit anymore and this guy is dressed well. He reminds her of Gregory Peck in the very old movie version ofTo Kill a Mockingbird.
“No, I work directly across from it, over there.” He rocks back on his heels and gestures with his coffee cup at the brightly lit gray marble exterior of the Excelsior Bank Building. “Boring money stuff, nothing as fun or interesting as journalism.”
“Well, I guess somebody’s got to do it,” she says, not entirely sure that is true. All right, maybe not Gregory Peck.
“Yeah, sometimes I wonder.” He laughs a bit sheepishly. “So, what do you do over at the paper? Are you a reporter?”
“Sort of. Something like that.” Alex takes a sip of her coffee so she doesn’t have to elaborate any further and winces as it scalds the back of her throat. It’s too early to be sharing her new position with anyone, not when she hasn’t even turned her column in yet. The column. Her stomach drops at the thought of all those letters she still has to read. She’s promised herself she’ll stay late enough tonight to finish all of the ones left on her desk. “Speaking of that, I should get back to it.”
“Right, right. Me too.”
They start for the door at the same time and there is an awkward moment where they nearly collide. He stops and steps back, motioning for her to go ahead. “After you,” he says.
“Thanks.” They lock eyes for a moment, and she feels a sharp fizzle of electricity between them.
“The least I can do after holding the creamer hostage.”
“That’s true,” Alex says, smiling.
“Well, have a good night,” he says. “Oh, I’m Tom, by the way. Maybe I’ll run into you again. We are work neighbors after all.”
I’d like that,she thinks, surprising herself. “I’m Alex. I’m sure I’ll see you around.”
As she walks across the street and into the lobby of the Herald Building, she finds a smile spreading across her face.
The light is still on in Howard’s office when she tiptoes back through the newsroom. Through the cracks at the edge of the blinds she can see a slice of his back as he sits at his desk. His computer monitor isdark, his phone face down on his desk. He isn’t moving. For a horrifying moment she thinks something terrible has happened to him, that he has had a stroke or a heart attack. But then she sees the slight quiver of his shoulders and the movement of his fingers through his hair as he buries his head in his hands.
Dear Constance,
For the very first time I have a real boyfriend. It’s crazy to me that if I hadn’t taken the job at the hardware store, I would never have met Brian. Who knows what would have happened then?
I can tell that Sam doesn’t love Brian stopping by, but I don’t know why. Brian is nothing but polite to him. Still, it bothers me. Sam is not someone who is normally rude to people. But when Brian comes into the store, Sam barely looks at him, never gives him the big smile he is normally so generous with.
“Doesn’t he have his own job to get to?” Sam asked, watching through the window as he got into his truck and drove off.
“He’s going there now,” I said, feeling defensive.
“If you ask me, he’s got a little too much time on his hands,” Sam said in his slow way.
“I didn’t,” I said to Sam, my heart pounding fast. I don’t ever talk back to Sam. He just blinked at me and walked away.
Brian came back when I was done with my shift. I ran out and hopped into his pickup. “How was work?” He pulled me toward him and gave me a kiss, looking into my eyes. All my worry dissolved in that moment. It is like that with us. Like we are in our own little world. Brian says we have something special, and he wouldn’t let anything or anyone touch it.
“It was fine.” I didn’t tell him about what Sam said. I’m not sure who I’m trying to protect exactly. I get the feeling that the two of them should stay far apart. I haven’t introduced Brian to my mom yet or to any of my friends, not that I see them that often anyway. I was so jealous of my friend Amanda when she left for college, and I stayed behind to work. Now I’d like for her to see me riding around in the passenger seat with a handsome architect. The idea of us together makes me feel proud, like I’ve done something more with my life than barely graduate from high school.
“What are we doing?” I asked, looking out the window. Brianwas taking us on a different route than we normally go on to get to his place.
“I thought we could cook at my apartment tonight,” he said, pulling off to go to the grocery store.
“Oh, did you?” I was happy that he wanted to do something so homey. This feeling of total bliss came over me as we walked around the grocery store. Maybe it’s silly that something so simple made me feel so happy. It’s hard to describe, but for the first time maybe ever, I felt normal. Like this is what it is like to be a couple. To have another person waiting there with a grocery cart at the end of the aisle.
Back at his apartment we looked up a recipe for some sort of salmon and rice. He was good in the kitchen. He poured me a glass of wine and I sat at the counter while he cooked. I felt like an adult, like I could suddenly see more to life than just Sam’s Hardware and dealing with my mom’s boyfriend.
There was music on, some mix of old French music that I’d never heard before. It had the feeling like it was Christmas morning. The fluttery happiness. Like I wanted to store the feeling up so I can revisit it whenever I want.
