Page 193 of As the Rain Falls
“I’ve given her the chance to explain why she did that, and she sort of blew me off. I’ve also invited her to have lunch with me, but she never showed up.”
Beckett crosses his arms over his chest.
“She’s not like you and me. Angelina is a tough one to get to know, okay? But she’s my friend, just like you are.”
“You’re telling me this like I don’t know it already,” I sneer. “Literally preaching to the choir.”
“Cass,” he sighs. “Have you read the newspaper lately?”
“I…”
Beckett promptly slides a random newspaper across the counter. I check the page quickly before looking at him again.
“I hadn’t before, no. They’re still milking this story?”
“Lucia is an addict now. Not just a girl who got drunk, decided to drive, and crashed the car,” he laughs it off, but even a blind person could sense the hurt. “Can you believe this?”
Beckett doesn’t know Lucia hadn’t been drunk that night. He doesn’t have a clue. Nathaniel made sure he’d never find out.
“No,” I swallow hard.
“There’s gossip going around town, but I don’t care about it. I don’t. But Angie, she’s… She’s drowning.” He closes his eyes. Pained, anguished. “She was Lucia’s best friend.”
I hear him, but all I can think about is how doesn’tsheknow? How doesn’t she know about what Nathaniel did to Lucia?
They often went out together. I’d listen to them laughing their way back home late at night. Sneak peeks while they climbed their way back to Lucia’s room way past midnight, secretly wishing I could join them just one time.
I never got to be a teenager, not like they did. Their freedom made me so envious. If something happened to Lucia, Angelina should know all about it. She’s the last piece my brother forgot to get rid of. Why is that?
“Hasn’t she said something?” I nudge, trying to figure her out.
“Not to me, no,” he denies it, face pensive. “Like I said, I just want her to be okay. And I’m not asking you to befriend her—”
“But you’re asking me to keep an eye open,” I finish off his sentence, playing with the tangerine, rolling it against the surface of the counter. “You’re asking me to play nice.”
“I’m asking you to give her a chance,” he corrects me. “I’m pretty sure deep down her mom wants my head on a spike after what went down. But if I can help in any way, I’m at least going to try. What do I have to lose?”
The answer is really quite simple.
Me.
“Did you come here just to get in my good graces and smooth things over to get me on her side?” I say out loud before Ican help myself, feeling like his timing is just awful. “Because if that’s the case—”
“Cassandra, no,” Beckett cuts me off immediately, sounding only sincere and nothing else. “You and I arenotabout this.”
“What if we misunderstand each other again?” I inhale lightly. “You weren’t the only one to feel some type of way about our fight, you know? I told you I could handle it. You didn’t listen.”
We know each other. We’ve always gotten along, as far as the memory goes. But is it enough?
I bet he’ll feel completely different about me if the truth ever comes out.I simply can’t trust Beckett enough to believe he’ll care about me and forgive the fact that I’m Nathaniel’s sister. Trust that is one-sided always leads to some kind of heartbreak, and I’ve already had enough of those.
I’m sick and tired of being hurt by men. It’s all they ever do to me.
“You got hurt,” he realizes, understanding dawning on him. “You get it, you understand me, but I still hurt your feelings.”
It’s more than that, Beckett.
It’s far more than that.
