Page 209 of As the Rain Falls
“Cassandra, I know we’re not really friends or anything, but can I say something?”
“Shoot.”
Angelina sighs. “What the fuck are you doing?”
“What do you mean?”
“Girls like you don’t mess around with guys like Caleb.”
“Girls like me?”
She hears the unspoken question. “Good girls. Girls with good friends who study hard and go to college.”
I smile sadly and say, “I don’t think I’m that girl anymore.”
“Maybe not, but you really shouldn’t be here.”
“I don’t know,” I whisper, but it’s mostly to myself. I blink hard, fighting off the tears. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”
I want to call my mom.
The words are right there, at the tip of my tongue. But I know she won’t pick up. She’s too busy taking care of Grandma.
“Why don’t you like me?” I ask.
Angelina is taller than I am, and it shows as we face each other. I find it impressive. She is impressive.
“To be honest, you remind me of myself,” she admits, looking pained. “Back when Lucia was alive.”
“Really?” I frown. “We’re so different, though, you and I. Besides Caleb, I mean.”
“We’re more alike than you think.” Angelina cuts me off, shaking her head. “Lucia told me so many times to stay away from him, but I wouldn’t listen to any of it. So, when you said all those things to me back then, I knew I couldn’t stop you.”
“I was just so excited about him,” I whimper, and my vision darkens as I speak. “It was nothing personal, Angie. I swear.”
“No, I know.” She shakes her head. “I know exactly how you feel right now because I’ve been in your shoes. I understand, really. You don’t have to explain yourself to me, of all people.”
I go quiet, dread climbing up my spine.
“I mean, I’m just sorry I couldn’t tell you the whole truth. It’s just too personal, you see. Even if I’m over him now, it still hurts really bad when I think about it.”
My stomach churns, and I bend forward, feeling my toes curl with the effort I’m putting in not to throw up on her.
“Oh my God, wait! Hold on a second!”
It takes her a little while to process what’s happening, but once she does, everything happens very fast. Angelina moves on instinct, grabbing Caleb’s little trash can and forcing my head inside it. As soon as I open my mouth, I start throwing up.
“Oh, shit!” Angelina holds my hair up, and I press my hands against the carpet, going on all fours. “Cassie!”
“What?” I groan.
“Please, please, please don’t get my shoes!”
“I’m not!”
A disgusted sound comes out of her.
“Trust me, it’s way worse to keep it in.” Angelina pats my back in soothing motions, coaxing me to keep throwing up.
