Page 165 of As the Rain Falls
Ihatethat about him.
“We’re not going to need them yet.” I press my mouth to his. “But good thinking.”
I sneak him out sometime before lunchtime. My lips are swollen. His back is scratched. Caleb kisses me until I can’t breathe before driving off on his bike.
I’m about to spin around and get back in the house, but then I feel it. I feel him.Hiseyes. Watching me. My head snaps towards the neighboring house, and—
Bingo.
Beckett is pulling the emptied trash bin back up the driveway. It’s Wednesday today, isn’t it? Wednesday is trash day. God. He’s looking at me, gaze unreadable. Almost blue.
He doesn’t even seem to be surprised, almost like he’s known all along that Caleb comes and goes, that I let him do whatever he wants. We weren’t quiet or discreet about any of the things we did together earlier.
Fuck.
“Hi.” I force myself to wave.
“Hey.” He waves back, just as awkward.
Beckett looks good, even from a distance.Better than the last time we talked.His blonde hair is a little longer, a little wilder, but freshly trimmed at the sides. The new haircut makes him look older, more mature. It sharpens the lines of his jaw and his cheekbones. Like he’s finally done being an awkward, messy kid and growing into a full-grown adult.More like a man.
I wonder if he misses me like I miss him.
Curious and insecure, I search for any form of disapproval in his face, only to feel my stomach tighten when I don’t find any.
Is it indifference?
Does he just… not care at all?
Of course, he doesn’t.
We’re just friends.
“Can you not mention this to anybody?” I dare to ask, shame be damned.
I catch a ghost of a smirk over his lips, like he’s seen through me. I can’t tell whether he finds this amusing or not, but at least Beckett isn’t judging me for dating Caleb. I don’t think I could handle it coming from him.
“Don’t worry about it, Cass.” He shrugs. “It’s none of my business, and you know I won’t.”
“Okay,” I say quietly, stepping forward towards him. “I…”
He freezes momentarily. The moment lasts another second, silence stretching as I struggle to find the right words.
“Yes?”
He stares right at me, and I stand there speechless, feeling too embarrassed at getting caught. Nathaniel doesn’t want me to talk to him, and I shouldn’t want to talk to him either.
God only knows Beckett and I don’t belong together.
Not after what Nathaniel did to—
“Beckett,” I whisper, my tongue too heavy in my mouth.
“Cassandra.” His jaw clenches, like he’s bracing himself not to reach out to me.
I clear my throat. “It’s been a while. You never texted me back.”
“Yeah, I’m sorry for that.” Beckett forces a smile. “How… How are you?”
