Page 15 of I Heard It All Before

He wasn’t trying to be insensitive, since he knew that Demi’s father was a tough subject for her. He, too, just like Kamari, had been in the dope game until he was gunned down a few years ago, along with two of his associates. Demi was in college at the time and she took the news hard. She and Kamari had only been dating for a few months back then, but he was there for her every step of the way. She’d been in Kamari’s ear ever since then, trying to get him to do the right thing. The streets were all that he knew, so giving it all up was easier said than done. Kamari had never worked a regular job a day in his life and he didn’t feel the need to at twenty-nine years old. He loved his wife more than anything, but their differences were driving a wedge through their marriage. Demi’s mind was made up, so Kamari had to make some serious decisions. It was either get a job, go to school, or risk losing his wife. He didn’t want to do either, but something had to give. Going back to school and obtaining his degree was what Demi really wanted for him, but he just wasn’t feeling it.

After finishing what Demi had started in the kitchen, Kamari walked down the hall in search of his wife. He found her sitting in the middle of their bed with her face buried in her laptop.After growing up in foster homes in the slums of New Orleans, Demi was the best thing that ever happened to Kamari. He didn’t let his guard down with anyone besides his best friend, until she came into his life.

He’d met her when he accompanied a few of his associates to a fraternity party that was being hosted on her college campus. Demi was standing with a group of her sorority sisters, but she stood out amongst the crowd. She and Kamari hit it off instantly, and he made the hour-long trip to see her every weekend. He was upfront with her about what he did for a living, and she never judged him. She did tell him that he should try to do better for himself and those talks only intensified after her father was killed. Kamari promised her that he would go back to school once she graduated, but that was only to shut her up.

Kamari never knew his parents or anyone else in his family, so he had it hard. He remembered all too well how it felt to go hungry some nights because the people who the state placed him with didn’t bother to feed him. He wore clothes that were too big and nobody thought to wash them. His hair was so dirty and nappy that sores started to develop on his scalp. Taking a bath was a treat because he didn’t get to do it very often. By the time Kamari made fifteen, he had dropped out of school, run away from his fifth group home, and started living on the streets. He begged for money every day, just to get a hot meal every night. When he made sixteen, he’d made a few friends on the streets and things began to look up. Kamari was introduced to some older boys in the area who used him to run errands for them. When they saw how good he was at it, they started giving him drugs to sell and he had been good ever since.

Kamari went from sleeping under the bridge, to renting hotels rooms. When his money started to look good, he got an apartment in one of his girlfriend’s name and never looked back. Demi knew his struggle, but she still didn’t fully understand. Kamari vowed that he was never going hungry or broke again if he could help it, and he meant that. He just needed his wife to get off his back and let him be the man of their household.

“I’m sorry baby. You know I wasn’t trying to hurt your feelings,” Kamari apologized as he sat down next to her.

“I know you weren’t, but somethings gotta give Kamari. All we do is argue and it’s stressful. You make it seem like I’m asking for too much because I want better for you.”

“It’s not that you’re asking for too much, but you have to give me some time Demi.”

“It’s been almost two years since you got your GED Kamari. How much time do you need? You could have been more than halfway through with the associate degree program by now,” Denim noted. She hated wasted time, but that’s all that Kamari seemed to do.

“I’m not trying to work for nobody else, when I’ve been my own boss all my life. Maybe I can do like you suggested and get my business degree and make something happen with that.”

“That’s a good idea baby and you know I’ll have your back every step of the way,” Demi promised.

“Man, I just feel like I’m too old to be going back to school.”

“You’re not even thirty years old yet. I was in class with people in their forties and fifties. You’re never too old to learn.”

“Yeah, that’s true. I guess we can sign me up for the next semester,” Kamari said, making her smile.

“Promise me, Kamari. Don’t just say what you think I want to hear. You want us to start a family, but we have to get ourselves together first,” Demi replied.

“I promise baby. You know I’ve been ready for you to get off those pills and give me some babies.” Kamari smiled as he helped his wife take off her clothes.

Once he got himself undressed, he lowered his body onto hers and kissed his wife passionately. Kamari hated to make promises to Demi, especially if he knew that he couldn’t keep them. He would do or say anything to make her happy, so his broken promises would just have to do for now. What she didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her, but what she did know would cause him to lose a wife. That was a chance that he wasn’t willing to take.

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