Page 78 of Third Time Lucky

I try to come up with a witty response, but before I can, the screen flickers to life with the movie’s opening credits. The chatter around us dies down as everyone settles in, their attention captured by the film unfolding before them.

As the main feature starts playing, I steal a glance at Ash. The soft glow of the screen illuminates his profile, casting shadows across his features and making him look as handsome as I’ve ever seen him.

‘I’m assuming fogged windows within seconds of the movie starting is considered pro-level theater going?’

I look ahead and instinctively cover my eyes. ‘Oh my. Yes, that’s a professional – very ballsy level of romance – with amateur moves, if I had to guess,’ I say with disdain.

Freaking, Madi. I get that she’s overly horny, but man, it’s hard to ignore what they’re doing right in front of us.

We stare at the screen for fifteen minutes, but I am in my head. He wants to spend alone time with me? Is he the man he mentioned who wants to give me the stars, moon and world?

Unable to bear the uncertainty any longer, I turn to face him fully.

‘Ash,’ I begin, my voice barely a whisper over the movie’s soundtrack.

‘Yeah?’ he replies, equally quiet.

‘Do you think he’d be mad?’

‘About what?’

I like how when one of us refers to ‘him’ or ‘he,’ the other just knows who we’re talking about.He(Kris)is the common denominator that connects us and the person who changed both our worlds. He taught me what love was, and I’ve been searching for it ever since he left.

‘Mitzi said something recently that made me realize I haven’t said this out loud yet…’ I inhale sharply. ‘I –likeyou. As in, I can’t quit thinking about you. I’m excited to see you every day. When your name pops up on my phone, I get giddy. And, secretly, I’m so glad we’re not sharing a car with those two right now.’

I look at the car ahead of us, its windows still fogged, a single handprint now visible. Ew.

‘Really?’ he says as if this surprises him.

I nod. ‘I feel safe with you. And youareincredibly hot, that wasn’t a lie. But to be completely honest, I also feel Kris, right here,’ I motion over my shoulder between us. ‘And because of that, I wonder if he’d be mad over what’s possibly happening between us.’

Ash’s slight worry turns to a crooked grin. He looks back to where I’m motioning as if he sees him, too.

‘I know exactly what you mean.’

‘Yeah?’

He nods. ‘I got his name tattooed on the back of my arm.’ He leans awkwardly, pointing out one of the many tattoos on the back of his arm. ‘Because I too feel like he’s always looking over my shoulder.’

I touch his name with the tips of my fingers. My God, that is sweet. Sometimes, I forget that he truly loved Kris as much as I did, possibly even more, because they had been partners in crime from a young age. It must feel like he lost a brother.

‘I’m forgetting him. I know how he made me feel. But I don’t even remember his voice any more.’

‘That part hurts, doesn’t it?’ he says with a frown.

I sigh heavily. ‘More than I expected.’

He shifts in his seat, turning my way. ‘Do you feel like you two would still be together all these years later?’

I’ve considered this before and came to the conclusion that, no, we probably wouldn’t still be together. Teenage love rarely lasts because we change so much throughout the years. I’m not the same girl I was at eighteen or even twenty-eight. Thirty-year-old me wants to find what teenage me thought she had, but I’m not sure I believe I ever will. Or at least I didn’t, until Ash.

‘No,’ I say, honestly. ‘Like all my other high-school friends, I’m sure he’d have faded into the background eventually. Why would he be any different than my relationships since him?’

‘Do you ever wonder if your life would be different had he lived?’

‘Yes,’ I admit. ‘I’m terrified that anyone that means anything to me will leave without saying goodbye; that started the moment he died.’

‘He’d have said goodbye, given the chance. I promise he would have.’

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