Page 5 of Can't Take My Eyes Off You

‘You’re graduating college next weekend with a higher GPA than probably any of us. I’m so proud of you.’

How is he this good at continuing to sweep me off my feet so many years into our relationship?

No one at the table acknowledges his words; they just stare like he’s spoken without permission. He’s the black sheep of the family – the one they have to chase and bribe into behaving whatever way they want. They’re always disappointed in him. It’s hard to watch and probably even harder to go through. He doesn’t love talking about what goes on between them, and I don’t push. It’s probably why I’ve never heard of the Harpers.

Thank you. I mouth the words to him. Then he does this thing he’s done the entire time we’ve dated. He points to his chest, then to me. A silentI love youthat’s consistently earned some weird swoony sigh from me. He’s a total romantic, and I love it so much.

‘What he said,’ Jacob says, tilting his drink my way before tossing it back in one swallow. ‘What are your plans going forward, Berkley?’ he asks, sitting back down at the head of the table.

‘Um…’ I didn’t expect him to ask about me. This almost never happens.

‘We do not start our sentences withum,’ Melinda corrects me. ‘I thought you were a writing minor?’

Rude.

‘Um…’ This time, I repeat it just to annoy her. Because why not? ‘I was a writing minor, but right now, I’m speaking. Did you know people use “um” as a filler while they find the right word or to break into a conversation without being rude and using something inappropriate like “listen up, fuckers”.’

Will snorts a laugh as his water glass is headed towards his lips, missing his mouth completely, then gasping as he accidentally dumps it down his shirt. Every head at the table turns to him. Clearly he’d die if he was choking to death because no one is attempting to leave their seats and help him. Finally, he pulls himself together, forcing away one last chuckle.

‘Sorry.’ He dabs his napkin to his chest.

Knowing he’ll live, all eyes turn back to me, horror on their faces like I’ve just publicly murdered a kitten we will now eat for dinner.

‘As for my plans,’ I continue like I didn’t just offend nearly everyone in the room. ‘Our apartment remodel is nearly complete and we’re moving in in three weeks. Frank’s retiring, and I’m now store manager. I hope to one day own it.’

‘Is it a grocery store?’ Felicity asks, like grocery store employee is less than respectable. I bet she’s never even stepped foot in one.

‘It’s a bookstore,’ I say. ‘You know, books?’ I push my hands together to represent an open book. ‘Those things people read to make themselves smarter. We sell those. If you can read, you should try one sometime.’

Yes, I’m being a snotty bitch to her. In my defense, not only does she want to steal my boyfriend, but she started this with the puppy-love pound comment. Now I’m just making sure she truly hates me, so I never have to converse with her again. My behavior’s completely logical.

‘I suppose you read the sad single woman porn too?’ she asks.

‘If she doesn’t yet, she’s about to…’ Mikey says with an evil chuckle, his eyes on Will. They shoot one another a glare. Note to self: ask Will what that was about when we get home later.

‘First of all, I’m not sad or single. Second, Will does an unbelievable job of keeping me romantically and sexually satisfied, thank you very much.’

Felicity frowns but Will grins with pride. And horror now lives freely on Melinda’s face as she glances between us. Is she truly only just realizing we sleep together?

‘But to answer your question, sure,’ I say. ‘I read some. Erotica, spice, fluff, romance, guilty pleasure, or whatever you need to call it to make yourself feel important, we stock it.’ I stab a fork into my side salad, going for a crouton but failing. ‘For the spicy stuff, Will and I try it out to see how possible it is. If it’s not, I copy and paste the scene into an email I send to Mike from an anonymous account that he literally responds to. He’s been begging “Amanda Mount” to come over and show him how to have sex for years.’

Mike snorts at this revelation. ‘That’syou?’

I nod, a proud smile plastered on my face.

A deep disappointed sigh leaves Melinda’s lips. ‘We’re setting Felicity up with William,’ she says, her eyes on me. ‘It’s been our plan all along.’

It’s been her plan?I can’t believe she just said those words out loud. To the entire table. Like she’s arranging a fucking marriage.

‘No way on God’s green earth will that ever happen,’ Will argues.

Felicity gasps, pulling a hand to her chest, like she didn’t expect to be rejected.

‘You can’t be serious about the woman who just used both the F wordandreferred to erotica at the dinner table, are you?’ she argues with Will. ‘She’s catfishing your brother.’

‘Weare catfishing my brother,’ Will informs her. ‘That account was my idea.’

Melinda’s jaw drops. ‘Why would you do that to your brother?’

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